what colleges look for in admissions essays

Character Counts: What Are Colleges Looking For?

Find the right college for you., what character traits do colleges look for.

What do colleges look for besides grades when they read your application? They take into account more than your GPA and test scores. Your character and the personal qualities you can bring to a college are important, too. That's why you need to think about your goals, accomplishments, and personal values. Then, you can figure out how you can best express those in your applications.

Top Character Qualities Colleges Want

"What is it that makes you unique, and how will you contribute to the life of our campus?" That's the answer to what do colleges look for in essays, according to Earl Johnson of the University of Tulsa. University applicants who demonstrate the following qualities of a good college student have more to contribute to a school:

• Willingness to take risks
• Sense of social responsibility
• Commitment to service
• Special talents or abilities

Overall, colleges want a mix of students to create a rich campus community. They want the class valedictorians, says Marty O'Connell, executive director of Colleges That Change Lives. However, they also are looking for "students who are going to be involved in a lot of activities, and students who are musicians, and students who are athletes, and everything in between."

Your College Application Shows Your Personality Traits

So how do you show colleges what's special about you? The positive characteristics of college students are not easy to measure. Nonetheless, admission officers look at the items listed below for clues about what makes you unique.

Extracurricular activities : What you do outside the classroom reveals a lot about you. That’s why some applications ask for details about extracurricular activities . But remember, it's not the number of activities that counts. Then, what do admission officers look for? It's more about what you've learned and how you've grown from participating in these activities.

Summer jobs and activities : Your summer experiences provide insight into your character. Holding a summer job at a fast-food restaurant can build as much character as attending a prestigious summer learning program . Even staying at home to help out with babysitting or household chores like cooking for the family shows character. It's all about what you've gained, what you've learned and how you communicate that.

College essay : The college essay gives you the opportunity to show the admission officers who you are and how you will contribute to the college campus. What are admission officers looking for in a college essay? Creativity, self-awareness, and a good command of grammar top the list.

Mike Sexton, vice president for enrollment management at Santa Clara University, says that when admission officers read student essays, they ask themselves, "Would you like this person to be your roommate? Would you like to work on a group project with this person?" The essay can reveal the answers to these questions more than any test score can.

Letters of recommendation : Recommendation letters can tell a lot about the kind of person you are. A teacher who knows you well can give insight into your leadership ability or your collaborative approach to team projects. A school counselor or administrator can also offer valuable information about your service to the school community.

What characteristics are important to colleges?

Admissions officers are looking for academic excellence and character strength. When you look at a list of characteristics of college students, you probably recognize many of them in yourself. Colleges are looking for leaders who are compassionate and caring about others. They want innovators who are passionate about their pursuits and willing to take risks. So, what do admissions officers look for? They want students who have clear goals and can demonstrate that they can achieve them.

What kind of students do colleges want?

Colleges are looking for students who will succeed academically, be involved, and use their talents to help others. When college admissions specialists review your application, they are asking themselves, "What qualities best describe this applicant?" It's your job to give them the clues they need to make a favorable decision.   

How can I stand out to colleges?

The essay you write as part of the application process is one of your best chances to stand out. What do college admissions look for in an essay? Reveal your passions, talents, and character with a well-written essay. Ideally, your college essay will illustrate a project or situation that contributed to your personal growth. Many applicants find that taking the time to write a thoughtful essay also helps them figure out what to look for in a college they have been considering. 

When they review your application, admissions officials will also look closely at your extracurricular activities and what you did with your time during summer breaks. They are seeking evidence that your presence will positively impact the campus community. 

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What Do Colleges Look for in an Essay? Examples & Tips

What is a College Essay?

The college essay is an essential element of the college application process. It presents an opportunity for students to personalize their college application, beyond grades and scores. It can also be one of the more nerve-wracking parts of the application process. 

If you are reading this article, you are like applying to college and taking the process seriously. The quality of the college you attend will have a big effect on your entire life, and taking a few hours to make your application the best it can possibly be may be the most lucrative time investment you will ever make.

What do colleges look for in an essay from applicants?

So, what do colleges look for in an essay? The answer is similar to what colleges look for in an applicant. To hit the right notes, you need to consider the perspective and even the mission statement of the college, which of course values intelligence, a good work ethic, and the type of personality that will represent the school. 

Therefore, the core aspects that admissions officials at any institution look for in an essay are:

·         Intelligence

·         Strong communication skills

·         Ambition and goals

·         Creativity

·         Proactivity and self-direction

·         Interest in education and self-betterment

These elements are not based on any abstract moral consideration–colleges want students who will make their institution stronger. They will look for evidence of these traits in your personal essay, as grades only reflect a few of these core aspects and abilities. 

Beyond these considerations, remember that an admissions officer (an actual human being) will read your essay and respond to it both rationally and emotionally. In many cases, that emotion is boredom. Keep in mind that these officials read hundreds of application essays each admissions season. But if your essay can successfully win them over, then you’ll be getting a letter that begins with a “We are delighted to announce…”

Qualities Colleges Look for to Include in Your Essay

Most achievements that colleges are looking for will be reflected in your college application, and therefore, these have been left off of the list below. The achievements showing your passion and drive, as well as your internal and external motivations, will be the ones to include in your application essay. 

Challenging extracurricular activities

Colleges want to see students who stretch themselves beyond the limits of the classroom. The kinds of activities you choose say a lot about your personality and even your morals. Whether or not you stick with your chosen undertakings exhibits your ability to commit to important projects in the long term.

Volunteer and work experience

Any experience you have that shows true commitment, leadership qualities and an interest in community is beneficial to your application. Include the organizations or companies you worked for and what your responsibilities were at each one. If you received any promotions or special recognitions, be sure to mention those as well.

Talents and passions

More colleges are moving away from accepting students who did the most “stuff” to looking for those who focus their energy in specific areas that they’re passionate about. Schools want to see what makes you special and how hard you’re willing to work at the things you care about.

Obstacles or challenges you have overcome

One of the most important aspects of a good college student is their ability to learn from mistakes and overcome challenges in order to achieve success. This is especially true for Common App Essay prompts . In your essay, focus on what exact difficulties or challenges you faced, how you overcame them, and what you learned from this experience. After all, admissions officials are more impressed by a student who came from an adverse situation and still achieved success than they are with a student who had every advantage handed to them and skated by on position and intelligence.

What is a well-written essay?

Admissions officers read a lot of essays, and a well-written one can make a refreshing change. Students should check their essays to make sure they clearly meet these criteria:

• Does the essay provide a direct answer to the essay question?
• Does it have a strong opening paragraph that captures the reader’s interest?
• Does it put forth a comprehensive argument or narrative? Does the student make a point and stick to it?
• Does it have a natural style that’s comfortable for the student and appropriate for the subject matter?
• Did the student use effective word choice, syntax, and structure?
• Does it contain correct grammar, punctuation, and spelling?
• Is it succinct? Did the student pay attention to the recommended length?

How to Write About Positive Qualities in an Application Essay

The rule of thumb here is always “Show–don’t tell.” When writing a college essay, skip generalized information. Instead, provide real, specific examples to support your statements. Your attention to detail will help make you more memorable to an admissions officer who has to read hundreds, if not thousands, of essays. 

For example, instead of “I love hiking,” you could say, “After reaching the summit of Mt. Kilimanjaro, I decided my next adventure would be climbing Mt. Everest.” What’s the difference between these two sentences? The first says you like something, while the second one illustrates that you do—but not only that, it also shows your level of commitment and your desire for challenge. Of the two example sentences, which do you think maximizes your use of words and would be more interesting to admissions officers?

Bad example: Claim without proof My teacher once told me that I was the most skilled and intelligent student she’s ever taught, and I believed her. When I set a goal, there’s no stopping me. I’ll work at it until it’s achieved—even if it’s to my own detriment.

Good example: Showing with concrete evidence In sophomore year, I decided to set a goal to raise more money for Relay for Life than any other student involved. I asked my neighbors, family, teachers, and even my paster, who sat through my 20-minute prepared speech about why donating to this campaign would be the best use of his money. I spoke to community groups. I did three straight weekends of door-to-door fundraising. And in the end, my efforts paid off—I succeeded in raising over $500 more than any other student.

Showing initiative and ambition

Initiative and ambition are top qualities that colleges look for in an applicant. Students who exhibit these traits will bring a positive and driven attitude with them to college, where it will help them contribute to the campus and succeed in their academic endeavors.

The college essay should always show how you took some kind of action—it shouldn’t just include things that happened to you as a passive individual. For example, rather than simply writing about how it was emotionally difficult when your older sibling got sick, discuss specific coping strategies you developed during that time or ways that you contributed to helping your sibling and family.

Showing self-reflection and growth

Personal growth is one of the most popular topics to write about since it represents what the admissions essay is all about: helping the college gain better insight into your personality and character. Some schools ask targeted questions — “What was the most challenging event you have ever faced, and how have you grown from it?” — while others leave the topic open: “Describe an event that has had great meaning for you. Explain why and how it has affected you.”

One of the most successful strategies is to use a past event as a lens through which you can assess who you were and the person you became, how you have grown and changed, and your transformation. Most children are curious, but were you the one who asked your teacher what caused the change of seasons of the year and then created a solar system model and explained the concept to your classmates? Though you may think that your topic needs to be bold and unique, this is not necessary to craft an effective essay. Instead, success lies in painting an accurate and vivid picture of yourself — one that will show admissions officers that you have much to offer their school.

Structure your essay with a clear beginning, middle, and end

When you include the basic plot elements of setting, introduction, conflict, and resolution, not only will your essay be more fun to read, it will be easier to write. And when writing is easier, you are usually having more fun and pouring more of yourself into your writing. You will find that this often translates into a more compelling story as well since passion and interest are hallmarks of any good story told to a friend or included on the page of an adventure or romance novel. When structuring your narrative arc, include the lessons you have learned from these experiences: How did you change? What did you learn? What did/do you plan to do differently because of these experiences? Anyone can write about how they won first place in a competition or spent a fantastic vacation in Europe. The important stuff is not in the itinerary, but rather in the diary–what you learned from the experience and how it impacted you.

Essay Introduction #1: Focus on Your Personal Qualities

One approach when beginning your application essay is to start by describing positive character traits you possess and then showing examples of times you demonstrated those traits.

Starting with your qualities A student wants to show that he is determined and tenacious. He thinks about times when he went above and beyond what was necessary to succeed in high school. He thinks of how he became the only student at his school to participate in three or more AP classes while also being involved in multiple sports and extracurricular activities. He also thinks of his volunteer work with his church at a local homeless shelter, where he made friends and connections with shelter guests and high-profile members of the community. These are the qualities around which his essay is focused.

Essay Introduction #2: Focus on a Personal Story

Another way to approach your essay topic is to start with a story and then work show examples that demonstrative your positive qualities.

Starting with a story A student’s sibling has been fighting cancer for the past three years, and he feels that this is an important experience that has shaped who he is today. He considers how the difficulties of this experience have changed him and help distinguish him from other applicants. 

From introducing his story at the beginning of his essay, this applicant can tie in the positive qualities he exhibits with the finer details of his personal story: 

• He is independent, as he needed to deal with taking care of a loved one in a serious and sustained way that his peers did not need to deal with.
• He is focused, as dealing with regular medical emergencies has not deterred him from achieving good grades and being part of his community.
• He is empathetic, as he understands personally how hard times can impact people.

Whatever essay topic you choose, your essay should provide admissions officers concrete evidence that you are an ideal candidate for their school. Your essay should have a memorable introduction that grabs the reader’s attention and guides the rest of your essay.

Repeat Your Qualities in the Essay Conclusion

Although your essay introduction is crucial in starting your essay off in a clear and impactful direction, how you end your essay is also important as it is the last thing that will remain in the reader’s mind. One surefire way to write a strong essay conclusion is to repeat the important qualities you discussed earlier. Recall details about your personal story or repeat the qualities you introduced at the beginning of the essay. Here is an example of what a good conclusion can capture what colleges are looking for in an essay: 

Concluding your essay by repeating your qualities During my high school years, my qualities of leadership, initiative, and hard work have help shape me to become the strong student I am today. As the head of our school’s volunteer group, I showed that even a teenager can make a big impact. As a student achieving high grades in all three of my AP courses, I demonstrated my dedication to education about all. Finally, as a daughter of working-class immigrant parents, I have used my value of hard work to achieve things my parents never thought possible. These values have contributed to making me the conscientious and successful student and person I am now, and they will surely continue to assist and guide me in my academic and professional career.

Interesting Essay Topics to Write About

There are hundreds of resources available online about writing college essays (including How to Write the Common App Essay ). And while you can find dozens of interesting and fruitful essay topics that have worked, here are just a few more that are not too specific and can be molded to fit your unique profile and personal story. 

1. A unique extracurricular activity or passion 

2. An activity or interest that contrasts heavily with your profile

3. A seemingly insignificant moment that speaks to larger themes within your life 

4. Using an everyday experience or object as a metaphor to explore your life and personality 

5. An in-the-moment narrative that tells the story of an important moment in your life

Additional Tips for Writing an Essay Colleges Will Love

Choose a strong essay topic.

First, whichever structure you will use, you need to ask yourself what you actually want to accomplish in life (esp. in terms of career) . This gives you your goals. You need to choose a program that helps you reach these goals—otherwise, you should seriously reconsider whether you should even be applying!  

If you are using the “Story” structure…

The story is going to be your topic, so make it an engaging tale… but remember you are not here to show that you are the next Shakespeare. There are three ways to go here: a story/description about yourself that shaped who you are and shows who you are. A story/description of something completely different that inspires you or is a metaphor for who you are.

If you are using the “Conveying passion for a subject” structure…

In this case, you have your topic (the subject you are passionate about), but remember the essay should be about what it means to you (don’t get bogged down in describing the subject itself). Use each subsequent paragraph to illustrate how you show passion for the subject or topic you have chosen. Be sure to use concrete details within the paragraph, but begin each paragraph with a “mini-thesis statement” that gives the reader a clear and concise summary of how you demonstrate your passion in a particular way.

Engage the Reader with Your Essay’s Narrative

The admissions officer will not be interested in a mere list of your personal qualities, extracurriculars, or accomplishments. This information is included elsewhere in your application. Instead, focus on showing who you are in your essay through a narrative that includes concrete details. 

But how can you plan the topics included in your narrative essay? First, grab a pen and jot down important experiences that spring to mind. Your experience could be something negative that eventually turns out to be positive or vice-versa. The most intriguing part of a negative experience is how you handled it and, hopefully, came out on top. Give your reader a setting to help them feel like they’re a part of your story and experience this moment of change with you.

Focus on what you care about most

Consider this a kind of brainstorming exercise. Close your eyes and imagine what drives you, motivates you, excites you, and inspires you to pursue great things (or at least fantasize about doing them). This might include a hobby, a genre of music, an important person in your life, a pivotal memory or experience, a book—anything meaningful that you consider part of your identity or that defines you. 

Start by listing these items and creating a word web of other relevant or secondary aspects of this one idea, person, object, or experience. Write some brief sentences about exactly why it is important to you. Once you have your list and a few sentences written, it should be a bit easier to narrow your topic to just one or two things at most.

Essay Editing for College Application Essays

One thing all schools look for in an essay is a document that is free of errors in grammar, punctuation, mechanics, and style. Admissions essay editing services are ideal for international students who struggle with English or simply want to take their essays to the next level. Students should take care to choose a company that’s reputable and employs highly qualified editors .

Check out Wordvice’s array of professional English editing services and proofreading services , including essay editing services, to learn how our editors can improve your essays and help you get into your dream school.

How to Write a College Application Essay

Find the right college for you..

Your essay reveals something important about you that your grades and test scores can't─your personality. It can give admissions officers a sense of who you are and showcase your writing ability. Here are some things that admissions officers look for in a personal essay for college.

1. Open Strong.

Knowing how to start a college essay can create a strong opening paragraph that immediately captures the reader’s interest. You want to make the admissions officer reading your essay curious about what you say next.

2. Show You Can Write.

Colleges want to see that you have a command of the basics of good writing, which is a key component of success in college.

3. Answer the Prompt.

Admissions officers also want to see that the student can give a direct answer while sticking to a comprehensive narrative. When writing college essays, consider the point you want to make and develop a fleshed-out response that fits the prompt. Avoid force-fitting prewritten pieces. Approach every personal essay prompt as if it's your first.

4. Stick to Your Style.

Writing college essays isn't about using flowery or verbose prose. Avoid leaning too heavily on the thesaurus to sound impressive. Choose a natural writing style that’s appropriate for the subject matter.

Also, avoid stressing about trying to write what you think colleges want to see. Learning how to draft a good essay for college is about showcasing who you are. Stay true to your voice. Keep in mind that authenticity is more important than anything else.

5. Proofread.

Correct grammar, punctuation, and spelling are essential. Proofread several times after you've finished. Then ask a teacher, parent, or college English major to give it a quick read as well.

6. Keep Track of Length.

Finally, admissions officers value succinctness. Remember to pay attention to the recommended essay length or word count.

Bonus Tips and College Essay Writing Help

For more on how to write a college essay, check out these Tips for Writing Your College Admissions Essay .

What is the college application essay?

A personal essay for college applications is an opportunity for admission admissions panels to get more insight into who you are and what you have to offer. It's often the most personal component of the application, going beyond grades and standardized test scores. Essays usually have open-ended prompts, allowing you to flex your writing skills and make a personal statement.

Does my college application essay really matter?

Learning how to write a successful essay for college is crucial. This essay's exact weight on your chances of acceptance varies from one school to the next. But it's an element of your application that all admissions teams consider. Your essay could be the thing that gets you off a waiting list or gives you a competitive edge over other applicants.

What are colleges looking for in my application essay?

Knowing what to include in a college essay is half the battle. Admissions teams look for many things, but the most influential are authenticity, writing ability, character details, and positive traits. The purpose of the essay is to shed light on your background and gain perspective on your real-world experiences.

When should I start writing my college essay?

Because you'll want to tailor each application to each school, expect to write multiple personal essays. Advisers typically recommend starting these pieces during the summer before your senior year of high school. This will give you ample time to concentrate on writing a college essay before you're hit with schoolwork.

What can I do to write an effective college essay if I'm not a strong writer?

Good writing skills matter, but the best college essay is about the quality of your response. Authentic stories in a natural voice have impact. The story you want to tell about yourself will work better for you if it’s told in language that’s not overly sophisticated. Work with a writing coach for help with the academic aspects. Make responding with substance a priority.

How can I write my college essay if I have no monumental experiences?

You don't need life-changing moments to impress an admissions panel. Think about your personal experiences. Describe moments that left a lasting impact. The important thing is to have a fleshed-out narrative that provides insight into your life and way of thinking. Some of the best essays revolve around meaningful moments rather than flashy ones.

How should I start brainstorming topics for my college essay?

Most colleges provide open-ended prompts. Using the topic as inspiration, think about critical milestones or essential lessons you learned during your academic career. Tell stories about real-life experiences that have shaped the person you are. Write them down to brainstorm ideas. Choose stories that highlight your best traits.

What is a good list of essay topics to start with? What essay topics should I avoid?

Good topics when writing college essays include personal achievements, meaningful lessons, life-changing challenges, and situations that fostered personal growth. It's best to avoid anything too intimate or controversial. You want to open up, but it's not a good idea to go overboard or alienate members of the admissions panel.

What format should I use for my college essay?

Read the prompt and essay instructions thoroughly to learn how to start off a college essay. Some colleges provide guidance about formatting. If not, the best course of action is to stick with a college standard like the MLA format.

How long should my essay be?

The average length of a personal essay for college is 400─600 words. Always read the prompt. Follow the instructions provided in the application.

Who should I ask to review my college essay?

Turn to your school counselor for review. They understand what college admissions panels are looking for, and they can provide valuable insight into your piece's quality. You can also reach out to English teachers and other educators for proofreading.

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Sat / act prep online guides and tips, 177 college essay examples for 11 schools + expert analysis.

College Admissions , College Essays

The personal statement might just be the hardest part of your college application. Mostly this is because it has the least guidance and is the most open-ended. One way to understand what colleges are looking for when they ask you to write an essay is to check out the essays of students who already got in—college essays that actually worked. After all, they must be among the most successful of this weird literary genre.

In this article, I'll go through general guidelines for what makes great college essays great. I've also compiled an enormous list of 100+ actual sample college essays from 11 different schools. Finally, I'll break down two of these published college essay examples and explain why and how they work. With links to 177 full essays and essay excerpts , this article is a great resource for learning how to craft your own personal college admissions essay!

What Excellent College Essays Have in Common

Even though in many ways these sample college essays are very different from one other, they do share some traits you should try to emulate as you write your own essay.

Visible Signs of Planning

Building out from a narrow, concrete focus. You'll see a similar structure in many of the essays. The author starts with a very detailed story of an event or description of a person or place. After this sense-heavy imagery, the essay expands out to make a broader point about the author, and connects this very memorable experience to the author's present situation, state of mind, newfound understanding, or maturity level.

Knowing how to tell a story. Some of the experiences in these essays are one-of-a-kind. But most deal with the stuff of everyday life. What sets them apart is the way the author approaches the topic: analyzing it for drama and humor, for its moving qualities, for what it says about the author's world, and for how it connects to the author's emotional life.

Stellar Execution

A killer first sentence. You've heard it before, and you'll hear it again: you have to suck the reader in, and the best place to do that is the first sentence. Great first sentences are punchy. They are like cliffhangers, setting up an exciting scene or an unusual situation with an unclear conclusion, in order to make the reader want to know more. Don't take my word for it—check out these 22 first sentences from Stanford applicants and tell me you don't want to read the rest of those essays to find out what happens!

A lively, individual voice. Writing is for readers. In this case, your reader is an admissions officer who has read thousands of essays before yours and will read thousands after. Your goal? Don't bore your reader. Use interesting descriptions, stay away from clichés, include your own offbeat observations—anything that makes this essay sounds like you and not like anyone else.

Technical correctness. No spelling mistakes, no grammar weirdness, no syntax issues, no punctuation snafus—each of these sample college essays has been formatted and proofread perfectly. If this kind of exactness is not your strong suit, you're in luck! All colleges advise applicants to have their essays looked over several times by parents, teachers, mentors, and anyone else who can spot a comma splice. Your essay must be your own work, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting help polishing it.

And if you need more guidance, connect with PrepScholar's expert admissions consultants . These expert writers know exactly what college admissions committees look for in an admissions essay and chan help you craft an essay that boosts your chances of getting into your dream school.

Check out PrepScholar's Essay Editing and Coaching progra m for more details!

Links to Full College Essay Examples

Some colleges publish a selection of their favorite accepted college essays that worked, and I've put together a selection of over 100 of these.

Common App Essay Samples

Please note that some of these college essay examples may be responding to prompts that are no longer in use. The current Common App prompts are as follows:

1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story. 2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? 3. Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome? 4. Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you? 5. Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others. 6. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

7. Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

Now, let's get to the good stuff: the list of 177 college essay examples responding to current and past Common App essay prompts. 

Connecticut college.

• 12 Common Application essays from the classes of 2022-2025

Hamilton College

• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2026
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2022
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2018
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2012
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2007

Johns Hopkins

These essays are answers to past prompts from either the Common Application or the Coalition Application (which Johns Hopkins used to accept).

• 1 Common Application or Coalition Application essay from the class of 2026
• 6 Common Application or Coalition Application essays from the class of 2025
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2024
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2023
• 7 Common Application of Universal Application essays from the class of 2022
• 5 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2021
• 7 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2020

Essay Examples Published by Other Websites

• 2 Common Application essays ( 1st essay , 2nd essay ) from applicants admitted to Columbia

Other Sample College Essays

Here is a collection of essays that are college-specific.

Babson College

• 4 essays (and 1 video response) on "Why Babson" from the class of 2020

Emory University

• 5 essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) from the class of 2020 along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on why the essays were exceptional
• 5 more recent essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on what made these essays stand out

University of Georgia

• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2019
• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2018
• 10 Harvard essays from 2023
• 10 Harvard essays from 2022
• 10 Harvard essays from 2021
• 10 Harvard essays from 2020
• 10 Harvard essays from 2019
• 10 Harvard essays from 2018
• 6 essays from admitted MIT students

Smith College

• 6 "best gift" essays from the class of 2018

Books of College Essays

If you're looking for even more sample college essays, consider purchasing a college essay book. The best of these include dozens of essays that worked and feedback from real admissions officers.

College Essays That Made a Difference —This detailed guide from Princeton Review includes not only successful essays, but also interviews with admissions officers and full student profiles.

50 Successful Harvard Application Essays by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson—A must for anyone aspiring to Harvard .

50 Successful Ivy League Application Essays and 50 Successful Stanford Application Essays by Gen and Kelly Tanabe—For essays from other top schools, check out this venerated series, which is regularly updated with new essays.

Heavenly Essays by Janine W. Robinson—This collection from the popular blogger behind Essay Hell includes a wider range of schools, as well as helpful tips on honing your own essay.

Analyzing Great Common App Essays That Worked

I've picked two essays from the examples collected above to examine in more depth so that you can see exactly what makes a successful college essay work. Full credit for these essays goes to the original authors and the schools that published them.

Example 1: "Breaking Into Cars," by Stephen, Johns Hopkins Class of '19 (Common App Essay, 636 words long)

I had never broken into a car before.

We were in Laredo, having just finished our first day at a Habitat for Humanity work site. The Hotchkiss volunteers had already left, off to enjoy some Texas BBQ, leaving me behind with the college kids to clean up. Not until we were stranded did we realize we were locked out of the van.

Someone picked a coat hanger out of the dumpster, handed it to me, and took a few steps back.

"Can you do that thing with a coat hanger to unlock it?"

"Why me?" I thought.

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame. Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally. My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed. "The water's on fire! Clear a hole!" he shouted, tossing me in the lake without warning. While I'm still unconvinced about that particular lesson's practicality, my Dad's overarching message is unequivocally true: much of life is unexpected, and you have to deal with the twists and turns.

Living in my family, days rarely unfolded as planned. A bit overlooked, a little pushed around, I learned to roll with reality, negotiate a quick deal, and give the improbable a try. I don't sweat the small stuff, and I definitely don't expect perfect fairness. So what if our dining room table only has six chairs for seven people? Someone learns the importance of punctuality every night.

But more than punctuality and a special affinity for musical chairs, my family life has taught me to thrive in situations over which I have no power. Growing up, I never controlled my older siblings, but I learned how to thwart their attempts to control me. I forged alliances, and realigned them as necessary. Sometimes, I was the poor, defenseless little brother; sometimes I was the omniscient elder. Different things to different people, as the situation demanded. I learned to adapt.

Back then, these techniques were merely reactions undertaken to ensure my survival. But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The question caught me off guard, much like the question posed to me in Laredo. Then, I realized I knew the answer. I knew why the coat hanger had been handed to me.

Growing up as the middle child in my family, I was a vital participant in a thing I did not govern, in the company of people I did not choose. It's family. It's society. And often, it's chaos. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, optimism, and preparedness. My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence.

What Makes This Essay Tick?

It's very helpful to take writing apart in order to see just how it accomplishes its objectives. Stephen's essay is very effective. Let's find out why!

An Opening Line That Draws You In

In just eight words, we get: scene-setting (he is standing next to a car about to break in), the idea of crossing a boundary (he is maybe about to do an illegal thing for the first time), and a cliffhanger (we are thinking: is he going to get caught? Is he headed for a life of crime? Is he about to be scared straight?).

Great, Detailed Opening Story

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame.

It's the details that really make this small experience come alive. Notice how whenever he can, Stephen uses a more specific, descriptive word in place of a more generic one. The volunteers aren't going to get food or dinner; they're going for "Texas BBQ." The coat hanger comes from "a dumpster." Stephen doesn't just move the coat hanger—he "jiggles" it.

Details also help us visualize the emotions of the people in the scene. The person who hands Stephen the coat hanger isn't just uncomfortable or nervous; he "takes a few steps back"—a description of movement that conveys feelings. Finally, the detail of actual speech makes the scene pop. Instead of writing that the other guy asked him to unlock the van, Stephen has the guy actually say his own words in a way that sounds like a teenager talking.

Turning a Specific Incident Into a Deeper Insight

Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

Stephen makes the locked car experience a meaningful illustration of how he has learned to be resourceful and ready for anything, and he also makes this turn from the specific to the broad through an elegant play on the two meanings of the word "click."

Using Concrete Examples When Making Abstract Claims

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally.

"Unpredictability and chaos" are very abstract, not easily visualized concepts. They could also mean any number of things—violence, abandonment, poverty, mental instability. By instantly following up with highly finite and unambiguous illustrations like "family of seven" and "siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing," Stephen grounds the abstraction in something that is easy to picture: a large, noisy family.

Using Small Bits of Humor and Casual Word Choice

My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed.

Obviously, knowing how to clean burning oil is not high on the list of things every 9-year-old needs to know. To emphasize this, Stephen uses sarcasm by bringing up a situation that is clearly over-the-top: "in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed."

The humor also feels relaxed. Part of this is because he introduces it with the colloquial phrase "you know," so it sounds like he is talking to us in person. This approach also diffuses the potential discomfort of the reader with his father's strictness—since he is making jokes about it, clearly he is OK. Notice, though, that this doesn't occur very much in the essay. This helps keep the tone meaningful and serious rather than flippant.

An Ending That Stretches the Insight Into the Future

But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The ending of the essay reveals that Stephen's life has been one long preparation for the future. He has emerged from chaos and his dad's approach to parenting as a person who can thrive in a world that he can't control.

This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. These are the qualities of successful college students, who will be able to navigate the independence college classes require and the responsibility and quasi-adulthood of college life.

What Could This Essay Do Even Better?

Even the best essays aren't perfect, and even the world's greatest writers will tell you that writing is never "finished"—just "due." So what would we tweak in this essay if we could?

Replace some of the clichéd language. Stephen uses handy phrases like "twists and turns" and "don't sweat the small stuff" as a kind of shorthand for explaining his relationship to chaos and unpredictability. But using too many of these ready-made expressions runs the risk of clouding out your own voice and replacing it with something expected and boring.

Use another example from recent life. Stephen's first example (breaking into the van in Laredo) is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people." It would be great to see how this plays out outside his family, either in the situation in Laredo or another context.

Example 2: By Renner Kwittken, Tufts Class of '23 (Common App Essay, 645 words long)

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver. I saw it in my favorite book, Richard Scarry's "Cars and Trucks and Things That Go," and for some reason, I was absolutely obsessed with the idea of driving a giant pickle. Much to the discontent of my younger sister, I insisted that my parents read us that book as many nights as possible so we could find goldbug, a small little golden bug, on every page. I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Then I discovered a real goldbug: gold nanoparticles that can reprogram macrophages to assist in killing tumors, produce clear images of them without sacrificing the subject, and heat them to obliteration.

Suddenly the destination of my pickle was clear.

I quickly became enveloped by the world of nanomedicine; I scoured articles about liposomes, polymeric micelles, dendrimers, targeting ligands, and self-assembling nanoparticles, all conquering cancer in some exotic way. Completely absorbed, I set out to find a mentor to dive even deeper into these topics. After several rejections, I was immensely grateful to receive an invitation to work alongside Dr. Sangeeta Ray at Johns Hopkins.

In the lab, Dr. Ray encouraged a great amount of autonomy to design and implement my own procedures. I chose to attack a problem that affects the entire field of nanomedicine: nanoparticles consistently fail to translate from animal studies into clinical trials. Jumping off recent literature, I set out to see if a pre-dose of a common chemotherapeutic could enhance nanoparticle delivery in aggressive prostate cancer, creating three novel constructs based on three different linear polymers, each using fluorescent dye (although no gold, sorry goldbug!). Though using radioactive isotopes like Gallium and Yttrium would have been incredible, as a 17-year-old, I unfortunately wasn't allowed in the same room as these radioactive materials (even though I took a Geiger counter to a pair of shoes and found them to be slightly dangerous).

I hadn't expected my hypothesis to work, as the research project would have ideally been led across two full years. Yet while there are still many optimizations and revisions to be done, I was thrilled to find -- with completely new nanoparticles that may one day mean future trials will use particles with the initials "RK-1" -- thatcyclophosphamide did indeed increase nanoparticle delivery to the tumor in a statistically significant way.

A secondary, unexpected research project was living alone in Baltimore, a new city to me, surrounded by people much older than I. Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research. Whether in a presentation or in a casual conversation, making others interested in science is perhaps more exciting to me than the research itself. This solidified a new pursuit to angle my love for writing towards illuminating science in ways people can understand, adding value to a society that can certainly benefit from more scientific literacy.

It seems fitting that my goals are still transforming: in Scarry's book, there is not just one goldbug, there is one on every page. With each new experience, I'm learning that it isn't the goldbug itself, but rather the act of searching for the goldbugs that will encourage, shape, and refine my ever-evolving passions. Regardless of the goldbug I seek -- I know my pickle truck has just begun its journey.

Renner takes a somewhat different approach than Stephen, but their essay is just as detailed and engaging. Let's go through some of the strengths of this essay.

One Clear Governing Metaphor

This essay is ultimately about two things: Renner’s dreams and future career goals, and Renner’s philosophy on goal-setting and achieving one’s dreams.

But instead of listing off all the amazing things they’ve done to pursue their dream of working in nanomedicine, Renner tells a powerful, unique story instead. To set up the narrative, Renner opens the essay by connecting their experiences with goal-setting and dream-chasing all the way back to a memorable childhood experience:

This lighthearted–but relevant!--story about the moment when Renner first developed a passion for a specific career (“finding the goldbug”) provides an anchor point for the rest of the essay. As Renner pivots to describing their current dreams and goals–working in nanomedicine–the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” is reflected in Renner’s experiments, rejections, and new discoveries.

Though Renner tells multiple stories about their quest to “find the goldbug,” or, in other words, pursue their passion, each story is connected by a unifying theme; namely, that as we search and grow over time, our goals will transform…and that’s okay! By the end of the essay, Renner uses the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” to reiterate the relevance of the opening story:

While the earlier parts of the essay convey Renner’s core message by showing, the final, concluding paragraph sums up Renner’s insights by telling. By briefly and clearly stating the relevance of the goldbug metaphor to their own philosophy on goals and dreams, Renner demonstrates their creativity, insight, and eagerness to grow and evolve as the journey continues into college.

An Engaging, Individual Voice

This essay uses many techniques that make Renner sound genuine and make the reader feel like we already know them.

Technique #1: humor. Notice Renner's gentle and relaxed humor that lightly mocks their younger self's grand ambitions (this is different from the more sarcastic kind of humor used by Stephen in the first essay—you could never mistake one writer for the other).

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver.

I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Renner gives a great example of how to use humor to your advantage in college essays. You don’t want to come off as too self-deprecating or sarcastic, but telling a lightheartedly humorous story about your younger self that also showcases how you’ve grown and changed over time can set the right tone for your entire essay.

Technique #2: intentional, eye-catching structure. The second technique is the way Renner uses a unique structure to bolster the tone and themes of their essay . The structure of your essay can have a major impact on how your ideas come across…so it’s important to give it just as much thought as the content of your essay!

For instance, Renner does a great job of using one-line paragraphs to create dramatic emphasis and to make clear transitions from one phase of the story to the next:

Suddenly the destination of my pickle car was clear.

Not only does the one-liner above signal that Renner is moving into a new phase of the narrative (their nanoparticle research experiences), it also tells the reader that this is a big moment in Renner’s story. It’s clear that Renner made a major discovery that changed the course of their goal pursuit and dream-chasing. Through structure, Renner conveys excitement and entices the reader to keep pushing forward to the next part of the story.

Technique #3: playing with syntax. The third technique is to use sentences of varying length, syntax, and structure. Most of the essay's written in standard English and uses grammatically correct sentences. However, at key moments, Renner emphasizes that the reader needs to sit up and pay attention by switching to short, colloquial, differently punctuated, and sometimes fragmented sentences.

Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research.

In the examples above, Renner switches adeptly between long, flowing sentences and quippy, telegraphic ones. At the same time, Renner uses these different sentence lengths intentionally. As they describe their experiences in new places, they use longer sentences to immerse the reader in the sights, smells, and sounds of those experiences. And when it’s time to get a big, key idea across, Renner switches to a short, punchy sentence to stop the reader in their tracks.

The varying syntax and sentence lengths pull the reader into the narrative and set up crucial “aha” moments when it’s most important…which is a surefire way to make any college essay stand out.

Renner's essay is very strong, but there are still a few little things that could be improved.

Connecting the research experiences to the theme of “finding the goldbug.”  The essay begins and ends with Renner’s connection to the idea of “finding the goldbug.” And while this metaphor is deftly tied into the essay’s intro and conclusion, it isn’t entirely clear what Renner’s big findings were during the research experiences that are described in the middle of the essay. It would be great to add a sentence or two stating what Renner’s big takeaways (or “goldbugs”) were from these experiences, which add more cohesion to the essay as a whole.

Give more details about discovering the world of nanomedicine. It makes sense that Renner wants to get into the details of their big research experiences as quickly as possible. After all, these are the details that show Renner’s dedication to nanomedicine! But a smoother transition from the opening pickle car/goldbug story to Renner’s “real goldbug” of nanoparticles would help the reader understand why nanoparticles became Renner’s goldbug. Finding out why Renner is so motivated to study nanomedicine–and perhaps what put them on to this field of study–would help readers fully understand why Renner chose this path in the first place.

4 Essential Tips for Writing Your Own Essay

How can you use this discussion to better your own college essay? Here are some suggestions for ways to use this resource effectively.

#1: Get Help From the Experts

Getting your college applications together takes a lot of work and can be pretty intimidatin g. Essays are even more important than ever now that admissions processes are changing and schools are going test-optional and removing diversity standards thanks to new Supreme Court rulings .  If you want certified expert help that really makes a difference, get started with  PrepScholar’s Essay Editing and Coaching program. Our program can help you put together an incredible essay from idea to completion so that your application stands out from the crowd. We've helped students get into the best colleges in the United States, including Harvard, Stanford, and Yale.  If you're ready to take the next step and boost your odds of getting into your dream school, connect with our experts today .

#2: Read Other Essays to Get Ideas for Your Own

As you go through the essays we've compiled for you above, ask yourself the following questions:

• Can you explain to yourself (or someone else!) why the opening sentence works well?
• Look for the essay's detailed personal anecdote. What senses is the author describing? Can you easily picture the scene in your mind's eye?
• Find the place where this anecdote bridges into a larger insight about the author. How does the essay connect the two? How does the anecdote work as an example of the author's characteristic, trait, or skill?
• Check out the essay's tone. If it's funny, can you find the places where the humor comes from? If it's sad and moving, can you find the imagery and description of feelings that make you moved? If it's serious, can you see how word choice adds to this tone?

Make a note whenever you find an essay or part of an essay that you think was particularly well-written, and think about what you like about it . Is it funny? Does it help you really get to know the writer? Does it show what makes the writer unique? Once you have your list, keep it next to you while writing your essay to remind yourself to try and use those same techniques in your own essay.

#3: Find Your "A-Ha!" Moment

All of these essays rely on connecting with the reader through a heartfelt, highly descriptive scene from the author's life. It can either be very dramatic (did you survive a plane crash?) or it can be completely mundane (did you finally beat your dad at Scrabble?). Either way, it should be personal and revealing about you, your personality, and the way you are now that you are entering the adult world.

Check out essays by authors like John Jeremiah Sullivan , Leslie Jamison , Hanif Abdurraqib , and Esmé Weijun Wang to get more examples of how to craft a compelling personal narrative.

#4: Start Early, Revise Often

Let me level with you: the best writing isn't writing at all. It's rewriting. And in order to have time to rewrite, you have to start way before the application deadline. My advice is to write your first draft at least two months before your applications are due.

Let it sit for a few days untouched. Then come back to it with fresh eyes and think critically about what you've written. What's extra? What's missing? What is in the wrong place? What doesn't make sense? Don't be afraid to take it apart and rearrange sections. Do this several times over, and your essay will be much better for it!

For more editing tips, check out a style guide like Dreyer's English or Eats, Shoots & Leaves .

What's Next?

Still not sure which colleges you want to apply to? Our experts will show you how to make a college list that will help you choose a college that's right for you.

Interested in learning more about college essays? Check out our detailed breakdown of exactly how personal statements work in an application , some suggestions on what to avoid when writing your essay , and our guide to writing about your extracurricular activities .

Working on the rest of your application? Read what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying .

The recommendations in this post are based solely on our knowledge and experience. If you purchase an item through one of our links PrepScholar may receive a commission.

Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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Frequently asked questions

What are colleges looking for in the essay.

In your application essay , admissions officers are looking for particular features : they want to see context on your background, positive traits that you could bring to campus, and examples of you demonstrating those qualities.

Frequently asked questions: College admissions essays

When writing your Common App essay , choose a prompt that sparks your interest and that you can connect to a unique personal story.

No matter which prompt you choose, admissions officers are more interested in your ability to demonstrate personal development , insight, or motivation for a certain area of study.

The Common App essay is your primary writing sample within the Common Application, a college application portal accepted by more than 900 schools. All your prospective schools that accept the Common App will read this essay to understand your character, background, and value as a potential student.

Since this essay is read by many colleges, avoid mentioning any college names or programs; instead, save tailored answers for the supplementary school-specific essays within the Common App.

Most importantly, your essay should be about you , not another person or thing. An insightful college admissions essay requires deep self-reflection, authenticity, and a balance between confidence and vulnerability.

Your essay shouldn’t be a résumé of your experiences but instead should tell a story that demonstrates your most important values and qualities.

When revising your college essay , first check for big-picture issues regarding your message and content. Then, check for flow, tone, style , and clarity. Finally, focus on eliminating grammar and punctuation errors .

If your college essay goes over the word count limit , cut any sentences with tangents or irrelevant details. Delete unnecessary words that clutter your essay.

If you’re struggling to reach the word count for your college essay, add vivid personal stories or share your feelings and insight to give your essay more depth and authenticity.

If you’ve got to write your college essay fast , don’t panic. First, set yourself deadlines: you should spend about 10% of your remaining time on brainstorming, 10% on outlining, 40% writing, 30% revising, and 10% taking breaks in between stages.

Second, brainstorm stories and values based on your essay prompt.

Third, outline your essay based on the montage or narrative essay structure .

Fourth, write specific, personal, and unique stories that would be hard for other students to replicate.

Fifth, revise your essay and make sure it’s clearly written.

Last, if possible, get feedback from an essay coach . Scribbr essay editors can help you revise your essay in 12 hours or less.

Avoid swearing in a college essay , since admissions officers’ opinions of profanity will vary. In some cases, it might be okay to use a vulgar word, such as in dialogue or quotes that make an important point in your essay. However, it’s safest to try to make the same point without swearing.

If you have bad grades on your transcript, you may want to use your college admissions essay to explain the challenging circumstances that led to them. Make sure to avoid dwelling on the negative aspects and highlight how you overcame the situation or learned an important lesson.

However, some college applications offer an additional information section where you can explain your bad grades, allowing you to choose another meaningful topic for your college essay.

Here’s a brief list of college essay topics that may be considered cliché:

• Extracurriculars, especially sports
• Role models
• Dealing with a personal tragedy or death in the family
• Struggling with new life situations (immigrant stories, moving homes, parents’ divorce)
• Becoming a better person after community service, traveling, or summer camp
• Overcoming a difficult class
• Using a common object as an extended metaphor

It’s easier to write a standout essay with a unique topic. However, it’s possible to make a common topic compelling with interesting story arcs, uncommon connections, and an advanced writing style.

Yes. The college application essay is less formal than other academic writing —though of course it’s not mandatory to use contractions in your essay.

In a college essay , you can be creative with your language . When writing about the past, you can use the present tense to make the reader feel as if they were there in the moment with you. But make sure to maintain consistency and when in doubt, default to the correct verb tense according to the time you’re writing about.

The college admissions essay gives admissions officers a different perspective on you beyond your academic achievements, test scores, and extracurriculars. It’s your chance to stand out from other applicants with similar academic profiles by telling a unique, personal, and specific story.

Use a standard font such as Times New Roman or Arial to avoid distracting the reader from your college essay’s content.

A college application essay is less formal than most academic writing . Instead of citing sources formally with in-text citations and a reference list, you can cite them informally in your text.

For example, “In her research paper on genetics, Quinn Roberts explores …”

There is no set number of paragraphs in a college admissions essay . College admissions essays can diverge from the traditional five-paragraph essay structure that you learned in English class. Just make sure to stay under the specified word count .

Most topics are acceptable for college essays if you can use them to demonstrate personal growth or a lesson learned. However, there are a few difficult topics for college essays that should be avoided. Avoid topics that are:

• Overly personal (e.g. graphic details of illness or injury, romantic or sexual relationships)
• Not personal enough (e.g. broad solutions to world problems, inspiring people or things)
• Too negative (e.g. an in-depth look at your flaws, put-downs of others, criticizing the need for a college essay)
• Too boring (e.g. a resume of your academic achievements and extracurriculars)
• Inappropriate for a college essay (e.g. illegal activities, offensive humor, false accounts of yourself, bragging about privilege)

To write an effective diversity essay , include vulnerable, authentic stories about your unique identity, background, or perspective. Provide insight into how your lived experience has influenced your outlook, activities, and goals. If relevant, you should also mention how your background has led you to apply for this university and why you’re a good fit.

Many universities believe a student body composed of different perspectives, beliefs, identities, and backgrounds will enhance the campus learning and community experience.

Admissions officers are interested in hearing about how your unique background, identity, beliefs, culture, or characteristics will enrich the campus community, which is why they assign a diversity essay .

In addition to your main college essay , some schools and scholarships may ask for a supplementary essay focused on an aspect of your identity or background. This is sometimes called a diversity essay .

You can use humor in a college essay , but carefully consider its purpose and use it wisely. An effective use of humor involves unexpected, keen observations of the everyday, or speaks to a deeper theme. Humor shouldn’t be the main focus of the essay, but rather a tool to improve your storytelling.

Get a second opinion from a teacher, counselor, or essay coach on whether your essay’s humor is appropriate.

Though admissions officers are interested in hearing your story, they’re also interested in how you tell it. An exceptionally written essay will differentiate you from other applicants, meaning that admissions officers will spend more time reading it.

You can use literary devices to catch your reader’s attention and enrich your storytelling; however, focus on using just a few devices well, rather than trying to use as many as possible.

To decide on a good college essay topic , spend time thoughtfully answering brainstorming questions. If you still have trouble identifying topics, try the following two strategies:

• Identify your qualities → Brainstorm stories that demonstrate these qualities
• Identify memorable stories → Connect your qualities to these stories

You can also ask family, friends, or mentors to help you brainstorm topics, give feedback on your potential essay topics, or recall key stories that showcase your qualities.

Yes—admissions officers don’t expect everyone to have a totally unique college essay topic . But you must differentiate your essay from others by having a surprising story arc, an interesting insight, and/or an advanced writing style .

There are no foolproof college essay topics —whatever your topic, the key is to write about it effectively. However, a good topic

• Is meaningful, specific, and personal to you
• Focuses on you and your experiences
• Reveals something beyond your test scores, grades, and extracurriculars
• Is creative and original

Unlike a five-paragraph essay, your admissions essay should not end by summarizing the points you’ve already made. It’s better to be creative and aim for a strong final impression.

You should also avoid stating the obvious (for example, saying that you hope to be accepted).

There are a few strategies you can use for a memorable ending to your college essay :

• Return to the beginning with a “full circle” structure
• Reveal the main point or insight in your story
• Look to the future
• End on an action

The best technique will depend on your topic choice, essay outline, and writing style. You can write several endings using different techniques to see which works best.

College deadlines vary depending on the schools you’re applying to and your application plan:

• For early action applications and the first round of early decision applications, the deadline is on November 1 or 15. Decisions are released by mid-December.
• For the second round of early decision applications, the deadline is January 1 or 15. Decisions are released in January or February.
• Regular decision deadlines usually fall between late November and mid-March, and decisions are released in March or April.
• Rolling admission deadlines run from July to April, and decisions are released around four to eight weeks after submission.

Depending on your prospective schools’ requirements, you may need to submit scores for the SAT or ACT as part of your college application .

Some schools now no longer require students to submit test scores; however, you should still take the SAT or ACT and aim to get a high score to strengthen your application package.

Aim to take the SAT or ACT in the spring of your junior year to give yourself enough time to retake it in the fall of your senior year if necessary.

Apply early for federal student aid and application fee waivers. You can also look for scholarships from schools, corporations, and charitable foundations.

To maximize your options, you should aim to apply to about eight schools:

• Two reach schools that might be difficult to get into
• Four match schools that you have a good chance of getting into
• Two safety schools that you feel confident you’ll get into

The college admissions essay accounts for roughly 25% of the weight of your application .

At highly selective schools, there are four qualified candidates for every spot. While your academic achievements are important, your college admissions essay can help you stand out from other applicants with similar profiles.

In general, for your college application you will need to submit all of the following:

• Your personal information
• List of extracurriculars and awards
• College application essays
• Transcripts
• Standardized test scores
• Recommendation letters.

Different colleges may have specific requirements, so make sure you check exactly what’s expected in the application guidance.

You should start thinking about your college applications the summer before your junior year to give you sufficient time for college visits, taking standardized tests, applying for financial aid , writing essays, and collecting application material.

Yes, but make sure your essay directly addresses the prompt, respects the word count , and demonstrates the organization’s values.

If you plan ahead, you can save time by writing one scholarship essay for multiple prompts with similar questions. In a scholarship tracker spreadsheet, you can group or color-code overlapping essay prompts; then, write a single essay for multiple scholarships. Sometimes, you can even reuse or adapt your main college essay .

You can start applying for scholarships as early as your junior year. Continue applying throughout your senior year.

Invest time in applying for various scholarships , especially local ones with small dollar amounts, which are likely easier to win and more reflective of your background and interests. It will be easier for you to write an authentic and compelling essay if the scholarship topic is meaningful to you.

You can find scholarships through your school counselor, community network, or an internet search.

A scholarship essay requires you to demonstrate your values and qualities while answering the prompt’s specific question.

After researching the scholarship organization, identify a personal experience that embodies its values and exemplifies how you will be a successful student.

A standout college essay has several key ingredients:

• A unique, personally meaningful topic
• A memorable introduction with vivid imagery or an intriguing hook
• Specific stories and language that show instead of telling
• Vulnerability that’s authentic but not aimed at soliciting sympathy
• Clear writing in an appropriate style and tone
• A conclusion that offers deep insight or a creative ending

While timelines will differ depending on the student, plan on spending at least 1–3 weeks brainstorming and writing the first draft of your college admissions essay , and at least 2–4 weeks revising across multiple drafts. Don’t forget to save enough time for breaks between each writing and editing stage.

You should already begin thinking about your essay the summer before your senior year so that you have plenty of time to try out different topics and get feedback on what works.

Your college essay accounts for about 25% of your application’s weight. It may be the deciding factor in whether you’re accepted, especially for competitive schools where most applicants have exceptional grades, test scores, and extracurricular track records.

In most cases, quoting other people isn’t a good way to start your college essay . Admissions officers want to hear your thoughts about yourself, and quotes often don’t achieve that. Unless a quote truly adds something important to your essay that it otherwise wouldn’t have, you probably shouldn’t include it.

Cliché openers in a college essay introduction are usually general and applicable to many students and situations. Most successful introductions are specific: they only work for the unique essay that follows.

The key to a strong college essay introduction is not to give too much away. Try to start with a surprising statement or image that raises questions and compels the reader to find out more.

The introduction of your college essay is the first thing admissions officers will read and therefore your most important opportunity to stand out. An excellent introduction will keep admissions officers reading, allowing you to tell them what you want them to know.

You can speed up this process by shortening and smoothing your writing with a paraphrasing tool . After that, you can use the summarizer to shorten it even more.

If you’re struggling to reach the word count for your college essay, add vivid personal stories or share your feelings and insight to give your essay more depth and authenticity.

Most college application portals specify a word count range for your essay, and you should stay within 10% of the upper limit to write a developed and thoughtful essay.

You should aim to stay under the specified word count limit to show you can follow directions and write concisely. However, don’t write too little, as it may seem like you are unwilling or unable to write a detailed and insightful narrative about yourself.

If no word count is specified, we advise keeping your essay between 400 and 600 words.

Colleges want to be able to differentiate students who seem similar on paper. In the college application essay , they’re looking for a way to understand each applicant’s unique personality and experiences.

You don’t need a title for your college admissions essay , but you can include one if you think it adds something important.

Your college essay’s format should be as simple as possible:

• Use a standard, readable font
• Use 1.5 or double spacing
• If attaching a file, save it as a PDF
• Stick to the word count
• Avoid unusual formatting and unnecessary decorative touches

There are no set rules for how to structure a college application essay , but these are two common structures that work:

• A montage structure, a series of vignettes with a common theme.
• A narrative structure, a single story that shows your personal growth or how you overcame a challenge.

Avoid the five-paragraph essay structure that you learned in high school.

Campus visits are always helpful, but if you can’t make it in person, the college website will have plenty of information for you to explore. You should look through the course catalog and even reach out to current faculty with any questions about the school.

Colleges set a “Why this college?” essay because they want to see that you’ve done your research. You must prove that you know what makes the school unique and can connect that to your own personal goals and academic interests.

Depending on your writing, you may go through several rounds of revision . Make sure to put aside your essay for a little while after each editing stage to return with a fresh perspective.

Teachers and guidance counselors can help you check your language, tone, and content . Ask for their help at least one to two months before the submission deadline, as many other students will also want their help.

Friends and family are a good resource to check for authenticity. It’s best to seek help from family members with a strong writing or English educational background, or from older siblings and cousins who have been through the college admissions process.

If possible, get help from an essay coach or editor ; they’ll have specialized knowledge of college admissions essays and be able to give objective expert feedback.

When revising your college essay , first check for big-picture issues regarding message, flow, tone, style , and clarity. Then, focus on eliminating grammar and punctuation errors.

Include specific, personal details and use your authentic voice to shed a new perspective on a common human experience.

Through specific stories, you can weave your achievements and qualities into your essay so that it doesn’t seem like you’re bragging from a resume.

When writing about yourself , including difficult experiences or failures can be a great way to show vulnerability and authenticity, but be careful not to overshare, and focus on showing how you matured from the experience.

First, spend time reflecting on your core values and character . You can start with these questions:

• What are three words your friends or family would use to describe you, and why would they choose them?
• Whom do you admire most and why?
• What are you most proud of? Ashamed of?

However, you should do a comprehensive brainstorming session to fully understand your values. Also consider how your values and goals match your prospective university’s program and culture. Then, brainstorm stories that illustrate the fit between the two.

In a college application essay , you can occasionally bend grammatical rules if doing so adds value to the storytelling process and the essay maintains clarity.

However, use standard language rules if your stylistic choices would otherwise distract the reader from your overall narrative or could be easily interpreted as unintentional errors.

Write concisely and use the active voice to maintain a quick pace throughout your essay and make sure it’s the right length . Avoid adding definitions unless they provide necessary explanation.

Use first-person “I” statements to speak from your perspective . Use appropriate word choices that show off your vocabulary but don’t sound like you used a thesaurus. Avoid using idioms or cliché expressions by rewriting them in a creative, original way.

If you’re an international student applying to a US college and you’re comfortable using American idioms or cultural references , you can. But instead of potentially using them incorrectly, don’t be afraid to write in detail about yourself within your own culture.

Provide context for any words, customs, or places that an American admissions officer might be unfamiliar with.

College application essays are less formal than other kinds of academic writing . Use a conversational yet respectful tone , as if speaking with a teacher or mentor. Be vulnerable about your feelings, thoughts, and experiences to connect with the reader.

Aim to write in your authentic voice , with a style that sounds natural and genuine. You can be creative with your word choice, but don’t use elaborate vocabulary to impress admissions officers.

Admissions officers use college admissions essays to evaluate your character, writing skills , and ability to self-reflect . The essay is your chance to show what you will add to the academic community.

The college essay may be the deciding factor in your application , especially for competitive schools where most applicants have exceptional grades, test scores, and extracurriculars.

Some colleges also require supplemental essays about specific topics, such as why you chose that specific college . Scholarship essays are often required to obtain financial aid .

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• Campus Life

Hey there, future college student! We know you’re busy worrying about grades and test scores, but have you ever wondered what do colleges look for beyond numbers? It turns out, a lot! 😨

So, don’t just focus on getting straight As . Take a break from studying, learn the secrets to impressing admissions committees , and check out these 11 insider tips that will help you stand out from the crowd.  

1. A High GPA and Class Rank

2. ap and honors classes, 3. strong sat/act scores, 4. commitment to extracurricular activities, 5. compelling letters of recommendation , 6. an excellent personal essay, 7. volunteer and work experience, 8. special talents or abilities, 9. passion for personal interests , 10. diversity, 11. a genuine interest in the college’s offering, what’s next when applying to colleges, what do colleges look for 11 ways to stand out to admissions committees: frequently asked questions .

Like it or not, getting into college is mostly a numbers game. In the eyes of the admissions committee, your high school grades predict your future academic performance. 

It’s likely that your transcript (a document listing your courses, grades, and honors) will be carefully reviewed . 🧐

Consistently high grades are important because they demonstrate your persistence to excel academically . But don’t panic; selection committees won’t expect perfection. 

You may not have straight As , but if you took challenging classes and did well, that may be just as impressive to the admissions officer — a B+ in calculus will say more than an A in Algebra 1. ✅

Plus, college admissions committees want to know how you stack up against your peers, and a high-class rank can help you a great deal in that aspect .  

READ MORE: Weighted GPA vs. Unweighted GPA: Which Do Colleges Look At?  

While these college-level courses may require extra time and effort, taking Advanced Placement (AP) and honors classes showcases your dedication to tackling advanced subjects with a more rigorous curriculum. 

Through AP classes, you can explore complex topics, develop critical thinking skills, and demonstrate academic excellence — which is what colleges look for in applicants. 🧠

The cherry on top is that you can save thousands of dollars in tuition when you earn college credit through AP exams. 🍒

Aside from boosting your GPA, this means that you might be able to skip introductory-level classes in college, thus reducing the number of courses you need to take .   

The mere mention of the SAT or ACT makes most high school students groan. But the reality is that your scores on these standardized tests can make a difference when it comes to impressing college admissions committees. 💯

It may not be the most exciting part of the application process, but investing time and effort into mastering these tests can pay off in a big way.

Students who perform well on the SAT or ACT exams have a better chance of getting into college , as well as earning prospective scholarships , early decision admission options, and college course credits. ✅

While several colleges have moved towards test-optional policies in recent years, submitting a strong test score is still on the list of things higher educational institutions look for in applicants and can give you an edge over your peers.

TIP: Over 80 percent of US colleges no longer mandate standardized tests for applicants. While test-optional colleges claim no bias, submitting SAT/ACT scores can boost your application, according to admissions experts.

READ MORE: SAT Dates and Deadlines: Quick Guide and Tips [2023-2024]  

From volunteering at animal shelters and starting environmental clubs to showcasing your mad guitar skills in a school band, extracurricular activities can be the golden ticket to your dream college! 

By dipping your toes in any of these side gigs, you’re demonstrating how well-rounded, curious, and engaged you are as a learner . 🏀

Admissions officers are interested in the impact of your work and the lessons you’ve learned along the way. So when filling out your application, make sure to highlight how you’ve grown and the challenges you’ve overcome .

READ MORE: How to Get Involved on Campus   

When considering what colleges look for in applicants, most students think about a high GPA, test scores, and essays. What many overlook is the significance of strong letters of recommendation . 🤔

A well-written letter from a credible teacher or counselor can highlight your strengths and contributions to your school or community. It can also provide insights into your personality and character that your grades and test scores can’t capture. 

Colleges typically require one to three recommendation letters from high school teachers or counselors so choose wisely! 🧑‍🏫

Pick people who know you well and ensure they can attest to your strengths. Share your achievements, goals, and interests with them to help them write a personalized and compelling letter.

A killer personal essay is your ticket to grabbing college admissions officers’ attention , allowing you to showcase your unique personality and stand out from the crowd. ✍️

What do colleges look for in essays? Select a topic that emphasizes your strengths and reveals your character . They want to see the real you shine through. So, begin with an engaging introduction that grabs the reader’s interest right away. 

Connect this experience to your intended field of study or future aspirations. Remember to stay true to your authentic voice to captivate the readers — illustrate how you can make a valuable contribution to your desired college community . ✉️

Volunteer opportunities go beyond impressing colleges — they offer college students skill development and career exploration.

When you detail the responsibilities and accomplishments you’ve handled, these can provide insight into your personal growth, work ethic, and leadership abilities . 🙋

Whether you worked for local mom-and-pop shops, community centers, or big businesses as interns , collect soft skills and practical experience (and a few connections along the way) to set the stage for future success. 🤝

Let your personality shine through and let admissions officers see the awesome person you’ve become through these experiences.

If you excel in music, sports, or writing, highlight your accomplishments when applying to college. Mention any outside achievements, like winning local contests or performing at community events — this can illustrate your commitment and skills beyond academics. 🎶

Take, for instance, James Austin , who earned a full scholarship to the University of Arizona because of his musical talent. 

Remember, expressing your genuine enthusiasm for your hobbies and talents can make a strong impression and demonstrate your dedication to personal growth beyond the classroom. 👏

TIP : You’ll stand out even more if you go that extra mile and add a portfolio or a self-tape video that exhibits your abilities when submitting your application. 

Passion goes hand in hand with motivation and drive, and it’s exactly what colleges look for besides grades. Students who are passionate about an activity or skill are more likely to go the extra mile , pushing themselves to excel and make a positive impact.

That’s why colleges want students who are excited to be there, so make it clear why you’re drawn to the particular school while applying. ✨

Let’s say you’re an aspiring literature student, talk about how the college’s literature program is top-notch or how a particular professor’s published work impressed you. 📚 

You can also prove your interest by scheduling a campus visit early on , actively reaching out to the admissions officers, and applying for early action or early decision enrollment.

READ MORE: How to Apply to College: 9 Steps to Application Success  

Having a diverse student body is incredibly important for college authorities because it creates a vibrant and inclusive community where people from different backgrounds, cultures, and perspectives can come together to learn and grow. 

Maybe you’re a first-generation college student or an international candidate pursuing higher education in the country? Or perhaps you are not a legal US resident and are considering applying as an undocumented student ?

If you have a unique background or an unconventional story to tell, don’t be afraid to let your diversity shine through in your application . In fact, that’s exactly what colleges look for in high school students.

Who knows? It could be the very thing that catches the eye of admissions officers! 🤩

Want to follow in the footsteps of legendary athletes like Michael Phelps and Serena Williams? Imagine honing your extracurricular skills in the state-of-the-art athletics facilities of your dream college. 🏫

When you’re writing your application, don’t just list generic reasons for why you want to attend that school . It’s essential to understand what do colleges look for in prospective students so you can be specific and talk about what sets that college apart from the rest . 

Remember, colleges want students who are genuinely interested in their programs . So, if you want to impress admissions officers, let your commitment shine through in your application. 

First, figure out what type of education is the best fit for you . Are you aiming for a trade school , a community college, or a public or private college ? Then determine how many colleges you’re applying to before figuring out a plan on how you’ll pay for college . 

Sure, you can apply for federal student aid and scholarships to reduce the cost of attendance. But did you know that affordable four-year universities and free community colleges exist? Some schools even forgo application fees for low-income families. 🆓

Next, take a good look at your college resume and think about areas that could use a little sprucing up. Does it address what colleges look for in applicants?

You might wanna think about boosting your volunteer gig or getting more involved in fun stuff outside class. And hey, don’t sweat it — you can totally start rounding up those recommendation letters and tossing around essay ideas whenever you’re up for it .

Finally, before you start sending out applications left and right, proofread your materials for any typos , grammatical errors, or inconsistencies. It’s crucial to present a polished and professional application to make a strong impression on admissions officers. 🔍

College admissions committees read through thousands of applications. It’s easy to get lost in the shuffle if you don’t showcase what they want to see. 📋

You don’t have to be the next Einstein or Picasso to impress admissions committees. By pairing hard work, determination with these insider tips, you can stand out from the crowd and increase your chances of getting into your dream school . 💡

What do colleges care about most?

Getting good grades consistently is an obvious answer, but your chances will improve if you prove that you can excel in challenging classes.  

College admissions officers also evaluate your curriculum, standardized test scores, and personal essay. 

What makes you stand out to colleges?

Concentrate on doing well in school and enrolling in challenging classes if you want to stand out in college. 

Display a variety of character traits, take part in meaningful activities outside of school, and gain unique work experience.

What classes do colleges look for?

While individual institutions may have varying standards and preferences for high school coursework, generally speaking, they are looking for applicants who have completed an extensive and well-rounded course load . 

English, math, science, and social studies are all required subjects. Colleges also check for students who have completed honors, AP, or IB courses since these courses show academic potential and aptitude for college-level work.  

What do colleges look for besides grades? 

Colleges evaluate extracurricular activities, essays, test scores, and recommendations to ensure candidates have pursued their passions even outside the classroom.  

What do colleges look for in essays? 

Colleges look for an applicant’s distinct perspective, competitive writing skills, and an authentic voice.  

Your unique perspective allows you to stand out from the crowd, show off your ability to articulate your thoughts clearly, concisely, and effectively, and and let your true personality shine through in your writing.

What do colleges look for in recommendation letters? 

Colleges look for sincere letters of recommendation that reflect the applicant’s accomplishments and abilities. It’s a chance for them to showcase their character, abilities, and potential for college success. 

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College essay resources

The #1 college essay myth (and what college admissions officers really look for), what to write about.

Brad Schiller

College essays are not the place to "just tell your story."

It's not that “tell us your story” is wrong for college essays. It’s just severely misleading. 

Yes, college admission offices give this advice all the time. But if you look at how they actually evaluate essays, you’ll see that what they look for goes well beyond “your story.”

This article will walk you through: 

• why colleges (and sometimes even guidance counselors!) give this misleading advice; 
• what admissions officers actually look for; and 
• how to deliver it for them. 

As college essay coaches who’ve helped thousands of applicants get into great colleges each year, we’ve examined the question of why the “tell your story” advice is so ubiquitous, and you need to know what’s really going on. 

Read the Table of Contents to see what we'll cover in this article:

Colleges say they want applicants to tell their story

Let’s go on a journey of discovery through the internet. What advice do colleges give about writing the essays they require?

We found one striking pattern (emphasis added): 

• [The essay] is an important part of your application because it gives you the chance to tell us your story as an applicant. — BU
• Tell a good story. Most people prefer reading a good story over anything else. So... tell a great story in your essay. — Tulane Apps 101: Ten Tips for an Epic College Essay .
• Your transcript and standardized test scores tell your academic story, your extracurricular activities, recommendations, essay(s) and background, tell your personal story . — William & Mary
• In [successful] essays, students were able to share stories from their everyday lives to reveal something about their character, values, and life that aligned with the culture and values at Hopkins. — Johns Hopkins  
• Tell your story. Some of my most memorable offers of admission have gone to students who like to color outside the lines. — Canisius College
• The college application process is a wonderful opportunity for self-discovery. You will find out things about yourself, what motivates you and what excites you. This is a passage to an exciting new chapter in your life. We want to get to know you and your story. — Muhlenberg College

Here are some videos that popped up as we researched this question:

And here’s an article from the Washington Post that ranked high in our search:

True, not every admissions department used the word “story.” 

We also found (emphasis added) —

• The point of the personal statement is for you to have the chance to share whatever you would like with us . — Harvard
• Be honest, be open, be authentic—this is your opportunity to connect with us . — MIT
• These essays are an opportunity to tell us about yourself in your unique voice . — CalTech
• Essay writing is an excellent opportunity for personal expression and original thought. — Northwestern
• The authenticity of the writing is what makes it effective. — Johns Hopkins - WaPo article
• “Imagine UC was a person. If we met face-to-face, what would you want us to know about you? These personal insight questions allow you to tell us. — University of California — see also their video on the topic:

In this category of advice, while the admissions offices don’t use the term “tell your story,” they’re still suggesting that you simply share something interesting about who you are, and connect with them in the way that you would with a friend.

However, when you look at how colleges actually evaluate essays, it turns out that this advice is wrong at worst and incomplete at best . So let’s do that now.

What college admissions officers really look for

Let’s hop back into the internet for another journey of discovery. This time, let’s search for clues about what college admissions officers do when they’re in the process of actually reading your essays.

As some readers know, at Prompt, we’re pretty excited about a lawsuit that made much of Harvard’s admission process public. 

The lawsuit revealed that “share whatever you would like with us,” as the college claims (see above) isn’t necessarily helpful advice. 

Instead, admissions officers review “ humor, sensitivity, grit, leadership, integrity, helpfulness, courage, kindness and many other qualities” in determining a personal rating for each applicant, according to coverage (emphasis added). 

Yes, this means that Harvard admissions officers give applicants cold, hard numbers based on whether their essays reveal things like grit and courage. So what if, based on their advice, you simply shared an interesting story about your passion for the theater or for playing sports? So that they could get to know you?

You’d be out of luck. Because without specifically focusing on an interesting, authentic story that also reveals something about your character, you’re unlikely to write an essay that they rate highly.

There are also clues that other colleges are looking for more than just a nice story or the “true you.” 

Here are some approaches we found to the process of assessing admission essays:

• Emory University specifically takes into account “ intellectual curiosity and the potential to contribute to community life on campus.” 
• According to the dean of admissions at the University of Pennsylvania, “We expect [applicants] to have high test scores and grades. That’s a given. So another way for us to think about merit for those applicants is, what did they do with that opportunity they were given? How far did they travel in their high school journey?”  ‍
• “It's quick and easy for candidates to share, and for admissions readers to assess a candidate's 'what,’” says the dean of admissions at Lafayette College, “However, the hope is to find the 'how' and the 'why' behind an applicant's 'what'. If a candidate is a chemistry loving, slam poet who pole vaults, cool, that's 'what' they are. But, 'HOW' and 'WHY' have they become a chemistry-loving, slam poet who pole vaults? Too many candidates stop at the 'what' and do not give the 'how' and the 'why.'”
• "As an admissions officer, I analyzed students' personalities ,” says the former admissions head at Dartmouth. “If … the student came off as arrogant, entitled, mean, selfish, or, on the flip side, funny, charming, generous, witty , I wrote that exact trait in my notes. It's not enough just to be smart at top schools. Students must also show that they'll be good classmates and community builders ."
• “We want to enroll students who will contribute to the life of the campus , so we are eager to see how you have contributed to your high-school community or the community in which you live,” says an officer at Dickinson College.
• “Applicants who are able to convey that they have spent their high school years exploring different classes, activities and opportunities immediately grab my attention,” says an officer at Drake. ‍
• According to an officer at DePauw University, “a successful applicant should highlight an ability to overcome obstacles and garner results . It’s about proving you can produce outcomes .” 
• During the pandemic, 315 admission leaders (including all the heavy-hitters, such as the Ivys), signed a “ Care Counts in Crisis ” statement, assuring applicants that they most value 5 attributes: self-care ; academic work; service and contributions to others; family contributions ; and extracurricular and summer activities.

Some supplemental essays also show what colleges value. For example, these are all about intellectual curiosity:

• Stanford — The Stanford community is deeply curious and driven to learn in and out of the classroom. Reflect on an idea or experience that makes you genuinely excited about learning.
• University of Washington — [T]ell us about something that really sparks your intellectual interest and curiosity , and compels you to explore more in the program/area of study that you indicated.

Once you start looking more closely at how colleges actually make their decision, you see that colleges really care about a number of specific characteristics .

5 traits admissions officers look for in your college essay

The point of a college essay is to prove you’ll be successful on campus and beyond. As Emory admissions dean John Latting says, “The whole [admissions] process is about finding potential .”

The way you prove your potential is by showing that you have 5 special characteristics. They go by various names, but at Prompt we’ve boiled them down to:

• Drive — going above and beyond what’s expected
• Intellectual Curiosity — manifesting your love of learning
• Initiative — Changing the status quo
• Contribution — Giving back to the community
• Diversity of Experiences — Having a unique background or experiences that give you a new perspective.

Go back to the last section and see how often these words (or similar ones) come up — you’ll see that it’s extremely often. 

To take a specific example, here how these characteristics align with the categories unearthed from the Harvard admissions litigation:

• Grit — that’s Drive
• Leadership — that’s a combo of Drive, Initiative and Contribution
• Helpfulness — that’s Contribution
• Courage — that’s adjacent to Drive and Initiative
• Kindness — well, that’s Contribution again

Now if you’re carefully comparing this list to the quote above, you’ll notice that we’re missing:

• sensitivity, and 
• Integrity. 

That’s because it’s true that they don’t match up to our 5 Traits. Humor is wonderful if you’ve got it, but “your college essay might not be the best place to try on that funny writer voice for the first time,” to quote the dean of admissions at Lawrence. (Diversity of experiences is similar, in a way, in that it’s a wonderful-to-have, but not something you can force if you just don’t have it.)

Integrity is a must-have — but most good essays around the 5 Traits should demonstrate integrity. Needless to say, any essay that implies a lack of it is a bad essay. As to sensitivity, well, if you’ve got it great. Not sure that one’s really make-or-break.

The point is that your essays aren’t a friendly “get to know you” space. They’re a vital component of your application; the colleges are grading your essays. And to score high you need to write about an experience in which you showed one or more of the qualities that they’re looking for — one or more of the 5 Traits. (If the experience also happens to showcase integrity and a sense of humor, all the better!)

Why colleges don't share what they're really looking for

At Prompt, we study the pronouncements of college admissions officials obsessively . We’ve gotten to know them , we read books about them, we follow them on Twitter. 

We don’t think that college officials are “lying” when they present this advice. Rather, there are many reasons why their advice isn’t as helpful as they probably think it is. Here are a few:

First , as we noted above, the advice to “tell your story” or “get to know us” or “be authentic” isn’t wrong. It’s just misleading because it isn’t clear about what actually gets evaluated. Most admissions officers probably think they’re giving helpful advice.

Second , offices are intentionally vague because it gives them more room to maneuver. If they say they’re looking for X in essays, everyone will write X . They want wiggle room for kids who write Y. 

Third , they may be thinking in different modes when they think about “writing an essay” compared to when they settle down to “evaluate” an essay. In Originals , Adam Grant describes how different these two modes can be. His book describes an experiment that randomly assigned some participants to think like managers and others like creatives. Those in the “manager” mode evaluated novel products correctly only 51% of the time; those in “creative” mode were correct far more often, at 77% of the time.

This is kind of the opposite. Admissions officers likely think broadly when giving advice for writing essays — they might be thinking about how they’d like to read essays, or how great essays are original, or focus on small, everyday topics. But that likely goes out the window when it comes to getting through a stack of essays on their desk and using them to assign “personal scores” that can be used to advance or reject applications. 

Bear in mind how overworked admissions readers are. According to an evaluator at Brown, “[W]e keep up a rigorous reading pace with the regular decision applicant pool. We were expected to read five applications per hour, which equates to 12 minutes per application. In those 12 minutes, I reviewed the application, standardized test scores, the transcript, the personal statement, and multiple supplemental essays — all while taking notes and making a decision on the admissibility of the applicant."

Make sure you write your essay to appeal to that “boring, bureaucratic” admissions officer. The one getting through a pile of essays, on a hungry prowl for qualities that will show success. We’ve got some stats to prove it can make up to a 10x difference in your chances of admission. 

Our team of expert writing coaches have helped 50,000+ student write 90,000+ essays that have boosted their chances of admission. Create an account to use free college essay resources , or explore college essay coaching options today .

Related posts:

• The Purpose of College Essays
• The Qualities Admissions Officers Look For
• Great Academics Aren't Enough
• What Harvard Admissions Data Reveals

The above articles and a step-by-step guide to approaching the college essay writing process can be found in our Help Center .

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What Admissions Officers Look for in Your College Essay?

This article was written based on the information and opinions presented by Anna Smist, a Yale Admissions Officer, i n a CollegeVine livestream. You can watch the full livestream for more info.

What’s Covered:

Writing about specific moments.

• Appealing to Admissions Officers

When it comes time to submit these essays, you will either be applying through QuestBridge , the coalition application , or the common application . Essays are one of the most important portions of a student’s college application. They present an irreplaceable opportunity to paint a picture for the admissions officers of who you are. College essays do pose their unique set of challenges, but there are tricks to help students with this process. 

To get started, think about the purpose behind these essays. A student has about 500 words or less to convey their story to admissions officers. When you’re writing, your topic doesn’t have to be about anything specific; it can be more general. Some of the best essays students have submitted were not about detailed descriptions of their interests but an experience.

You can start with a general topic, such as your interests or extracurricular activities, and then dive deeper into a specific experience you had in one of those topics. An example could be writing about a relationship that you have with someone, but, instead of talking about the relationship, you can reflect on a conversation you had with them. This will bring a personal aspect to the essay and make the reader feel more connected to you as the writer. Similar things can be done with places. If you want to write about a place that has meaning to you, you can dive into a particular event that happened at that location and why it has meaning to you. Your essays are all about bringing the reader into your life, and the best way to accomplish that is by writing about specific events.

Appealing To Admissions Officers

Making your story unique.

Students shouldn’t write about anything too general, and there are no cookie-cutter expectations for students’ essay topics. When you approach your essays, try to write about something only you can talk about. There are thousands of students writing about the same topic as you are, so you have to find a way to differentiate yourself from the others. This is what admissions officers are looking for in your essays. They want to read about a unique story or memory that no other student could have written about except for you. 

Let Your Voice Shine Through

Ultimately, when it comes from your voice or your view, it’s going to sound unique and different. Think about books and movies. Many are over the same topic, but the way the story is told matters a lot. When you read a novel from the first-person perspective, you get inside that person’s head for a moment and get to see how they think. Reading essays is something admissions officers really like because they get to know the student. When you are writing your essay, make sure your voice comes through . Admissions officers want to know what kind of student you are and how you will fit into their campus community. The best way for them to understand this is through your essays. 

Students often share topics or stories that the admissions officers might not be familiar with. For example, when writing about your diverse experience in terms of sexuality, gender, or race, the admissions officer reading it might not be familiar with your exact experience. No matter your topic, make sure you provide some context to your essays so that no matter who the admissions officer is, your story will come across.

If you’re looking for some examples of college essays to help get you started, check out this post: 19 Stellar Common App Essay Examples .

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For highly selective schools, the competition is intense, with many applicants having outstanding academic records and test scores. These institutions, such as the Ivies, MIT, and Stanford, typically accept only 5%-10% of applicants. In this context, a great essay becomes a critical differentiator that can significantly boost your chances of getting selected among similarly qualified candidates. A well-crafted essay that vividly describes your unique experiences can make a strong impression. While a poor essay can harm an otherwise strong application, an excellent essay alone usually won't secure admission without solid academic credentials. However, for those who meet the high academic standards, an exceptional essay can be the factor that sets you apart.

What Do Colleges Look For in an Essay From Applicants?

Essentially, colleges seek attributes that align with their values and contribute positively to their campus community. 

This includes intelligence, strong communication skills, ambition, creativity, proactivity, and a genuine interest in personal growth and education. These qualities are crucial because they reflect a student's potential to enrich the college environment. Admissions officers, who read countless essays each season, are looking for a unique perspective, compelling storytelling, and an authentic voice that engages them emotionally and intellectually. A standout essay, one that feels like a genuine conversation, can significantly enhance your chances of receiving that coveted acceptance letter.

Writing a Stand Out College Essay for College Applications

The college essay is a chance for applicants to go beyond their grades and activities and show who they really are. It's about sharing personal stories of growth and discovery that make them unique. 

Instead of sounding academic, it's important to write in a way that feels genuine and true to oneself. Before starting, it helps to reflect on questions like what makes them stand out and what they hope to achieve in college. The essay shouldn't just repeat what's on their resume but should focus on a specific, meaningful story or lesson that highlights their character and goals. 

Colleges value initiative and ambition, so essays should showcase actions taken and personal growth achieved. Whether reflecting on overcoming challenges or exploring moments of significant personal development, the essay should provide a deeper understanding of who the applicant is and what they can contribute to the college community.

Using Stories to Show, Not Just Tell in Your College Essay

When writing your college essay, remember to show rather than just tell. This means using specific examples and anecdotes instead of general statements. 

Admissions officers read many essays, so details and stories make your essay more memorable. Instead of listing activities, focus on sharing stories that show your personal growth and emotions. This approach not only makes your essay more engaging but also helps admissions officers understand your unique qualities and experiences better.

Tips for Structuring Your College Essay

When crafting your college essay, it's crucial to write with your reader in mind. Make sure your ideas flow logically from one paragraph to the next, using transitions to help guide them through your thoughts. 

Make sure your essay looks neat with readable fonts, proper margins, and clear dialogue formatting. Starting with good grammar and clear sentences sets a professional tone and shows you pay attention to details. Strong essays are also free of grammar and spelling mistakes, which shows you care about quality. Focus on including only important information that supports your main point, and avoid adding unnecessary details.

Check that your essay makes sense and has a clear beginning, middle, and end. Provide enough background information without making your writing too long. Be yourself and avoid exaggerating or downplaying your experiences. Share your strengths and how you've grown honestly. Instead of focusing too much on past challenges, emphasize how you've overcome them and how they've shaped your future goals.

Seek feedback from a diverse group of individuals—teachers, family members, and friends—to gain varied perspectives. Listen carefully to each person's interpretation of your essay. Revise any confusing parts based on their feedback. Keep in mind that admissions committees are made up of different people, each with their own viewpoints that can affect your application. However, limit feedback to two or three trusted sources to avoid overwhelming yourself with conflicting opinions from multiple biases.

And remember, you don’t have to navigate the application essay process alone; there are many universities and nonprofits that offer numerous online resources. At 7EDU, we provide free blogs and webinars on college admissions, including topics like essay writing, to support your application journey.

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How to Write Your College Essay: Getting Started

• Post author By Anita Doar
• Post date June 17, 2024
• No Comments on How to Write Your College Essay: Getting Started

Whether it’s convincing yourself to get out the door to go for a run, kicking an unhealthy habit, or starting a school assignment you’ve been avoiding, one of the biggest decisions you’ll have to make is simply to begin. In his book The Art of the Start , Guy Kawasaki, Apple’s “Chief Evangelist” marketer under Steve Jobs, captures the feeling best: “The hardest thing about getting started is getting started.”

To many rising seniors this summer, the Common App essay may feel like an insurmountable challenge: one so important, so all-encompassing, that it’s impossible to know where to start. How do I capture the essence of myself in 650 words? How can I boil my entire life down to one page? How do I convince admissions readers that I’m the one and only me?

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THE COLLEGE ESSAY: OUR TOP TIER TEAM WEIGHS IN

Before you get carried away thinking that your entire life’s worth is hanging in the balance of 650 words, our first tip is to keep some perspective. I connected with a few of our Top Tier Senior Private Counselors to get their thoughts on this.

Though it’s true that the Common App essay presents a significant opportunity to share your voice and emphasize a compelling experience you’ve had or impact you’ve made, it’s not the be-all and end-all it may feel like.  As they plow through thousands of applications, admissions readers are “focused on discerning the main point of your essay rather than marking it up as your English teacher would,” according to Heidi Steinmetz Lovette , TTA Senior Private Counselor and former Assistant Director of Admissions at Cornell. Dr. Tina Brooks , TTA Senior Private Counselor and former Associate Director of Admissions at Pomona, describes the “luck of the draw” factor in admissions: “I read with partners who had  very  different views on what constituted good writing. You don’t know if your admissions reader is a former English professor or a just-out-of-college music major, so it’s most important to write with your own voice and perspective.” Nellie Brennan Hall , TTA Senior Private Counselor and former Associate Director of Admissions at Brown, shares the reassuring perspective that “the vast majority of essays aren’t quirky or funny—they’re straightforward. We’re just trying to learn more about you.”

What’s the secret to a powerful and strategic college essay? And what is the straightforward message it should convey? The Top Tier Admissions team has assessed thousands of applications and knows what works (and what doesn’t). Rising seniors: we still have a few seats available in our Application Boot Camp® program (August 2-5) or schedule a Personal Boot Camp on your own schedule.

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HOW TO WRITE YOUR COLLEGE ESSAY: TOP TIPS

So as you toggle between the 2024-25 Common App prompts and that bright white page, a blinking cursor patiently awaiting your genius inspiration, here are some tips on different ways to get the juices flowing. Cue the Black-Eyed Peas: “ Let’s get it started / Let’s get it started in here…”

• Try freewriting in a no judgment, no filter, stream-of-consciousness style for at least 20 minutes. Share your writing with a trusted parent, advisor, or teacher and ask them what they think the most interesting nugget is—that could be your jumping off point of the essay.
• Brainstorm a bunch of anecdotes connected to any part of your story—from everyday occurrences to significant moments. Don’t worry at all about the transition or connection between them. Ideally, these will eventually become the heart and soul of your essay!
• Write about a moment of tension: a conflict or barrier you faced, or a surprising turn of events. Drop the reader in the middle of the scene with no lead up or explanation. After drawing them in with this compelling moment, then you can pan out in the next paragraph to explain the context.
• Try focusing on an object that represents part of your story: a historical monument, a souvenir from a science museum, a painting by a famous artist, or a billboard you’ve always driven past. Start by describing it and invite the reader to make the connection throughout the essay. This approach can also work with a place of significance to you: a science lab, a riverbank, a historical society, or a family kitchen, for example.
• For inspiration, read our blog, The Secret to a Memorable College Essay: A Great Hook . But if you are still stumped on how to start, start anywhere! What part of your narrative could you sit down and write right away without too much sweat? Start there, and let the essay take shape around it.

Remember: your final essay will look very different from your first draft, so try not to angst too much about getting started.

If you enjoyed this post, follow us on  Instagram  @toptieradmissions for more tips and  subscribe to our blog for expert insights & college admissions news !

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10 Successful Harvard Application Essays | 2024

With the top applicants from every high school applying to the best schools in the country, it's important to have an edge in your college application. Check out our list of 10 new Harvard application essays from students who made it in, and hear from expert college consultants about what made these work.

Sarika's Essay

Get accepted to your dream college with The Ivy Institute, a leading college admissions consulting firm. With a team comprising former Ivy League admissions officers and students, our innovative strategies can increase students’ chances of acceptance by up to 12 times the average. Celebrated globally with features in over 500 publications, The Ivy Institute uses Predictive Admissions™ to guide students with data-driven insights to maximize success. Join students from around the world who have achieved their Ivy League dreams with The Ivy Institute! You may learn more and schedule a consultation at www.theivyinst.org .

Successful Harvard Essay

I, Too, Can Dance

I was in love with the way the dainty pink mouse glided across the stage, her tutu twirling as she pirouetted and her rose-colored bow following the motion of her outstretched arms with every grand jeté.

I had always dreamed I would dance, and Angelina Ballerina made it seem so easy. There was something so freeing about the way she wove her body into the delicate threads of the Sugar Plum Fairy’s song each time she performed an arabesque. I longed for my whole being to melt into the magical melodies of music; I longed to enchant the world with my own stories; and I longed for the smile that glimmered on every dancer’s face.

At recess, my friends and I would improvise dances. But while they seemed well on their way to achieving ballerina status, my figure eights were more like zeroes and every attempt at spinning around left me feeling dizzy. Sometimes, I even ran over my friends’ toes. How could I share my stories with others if I managed to injure them with my wheelchair before the story even began?

I then tried piano, but my fingers stumbled across the keys in an uncoordinated staccato tap dance of sorts. I tried art, but the clumsiness of my brush left the canvas a colorful mess. I tried the recorder, but had Angelina existed in real life, my rendition of “Mary Had a Little Lamb” would have frozen her in midair, with flute-like screeches tumbling through the air before ending in an awkward split and shattering the gossamer world the Sugar Plum Fairy had worked so hard to build.

For as long as I could remember, I’d also been fascinated by words, but I’d never explored writing until one day in fourth grade, the school librarian announced a poetry contest. That night, as I tried to sleep, ideas scampered through my head like Nutcracker mice awakening a sleeping Clara to a mystical new world. By morning, I had choreographed the mice to tell a winning story in verse about all the marvelous outer space factoids I knew.

Now, my pencil pirouettes perfect O’s on paper amidst sagas of doting mothers and evanescent lovers. The tip of my pen stipples the lines of my notebook with the tale of a father’s grief, like a ballerina tiptoeing en pointe; as the man finds solace in nature, the ink flows gracefully, and for a moment, it leaps off the page, as if reaching out to the heavens to embrace his daughter’s soul. Late at night, my fingers tap dance across the keys of my laptop, tap tap tapping an article about the latest breakthrough in cancer research—maybe LDCT scans or aneuploidy-targeted therapy could have saved the daughter’s life; a Spanish poem about the beauty of unspoken moments; and the story of a girl in a wheelchair who learned how to dance.

As the world sleeps, I lose myself in the cathartic cadences of fresh ink, bursting with stories to be told and melting into parched paper.

As the world sleeps, I lose myself in the cathartic cadences of fresh ink, bursting with stories to be told and melting into parched paper. I cobble together phrases until they spring off my tongue, as if the Sugar Plum Fairy herself has transformed the staccato rumblings of my brain into something legato and sweet. I weave my heart, my soul, my very being into my words as I read them out loud, until they become almost like a chant. With every rehearsal, I search for the perfect finale to complete my creation. When I finally find it, eyes dry with midnight-induced euphoria, I remember that night so many years ago when I discovered the magic of writing, and smile.

I may not dance across the stage like Angelina Ballerina, but I can dance across the page.

I, too, can dance.

Professional Review by Ivy Institute

⁤In this essay "I, Too, Can Dance," Sarika skillfully describes how she went from wanting to dance like the made-up character Angelina Ballerina to discovering deep fulfillment and a way to express herself via writing. ⁤⁤The essay opens with a detailed account of Sarika's early fascination in dance, which was sparked by the animated performances she saw on television. ⁤⁤However, we learn that her first attempts to mimic these dancing routines are hampered by her physical constraints in a wheelchair, which complicates and frustrates her young goals.

⁤Despite these difficulties, Sarika's story is full of tenacity and originality. ⁤⁤Her experiences with other artistic mediums, such as painting and piano, follow a similar pattern of initial enthusiasm followed by an awareness of her physical limitations. ⁤⁤However, these endeavors are presented as stepping stones, each one strengthening her drive and guiding her in the direction of a field in which she may genuinely succeed. ⁤

When Sarika discovers writing, her story takes a dramatic turn. ⁤⁤This realization is not just a solace but also a victorious discovery of her voice. ⁤⁤Writing takes on the role of her dance floor, where words enable her to move gracefully, telling tales and articulating concepts with the same grace and fluidity that performers display on stage. ⁤⁤Sarika describes her writing process using dance-related imagery, such as her pencil "pirouettes" and her narratives "leaping off the page," effectively drawing comparisons between dance and writing. ⁤

⁤Sarika's profound reflection and her mature realization that artistic expression can take numerous forms are what make her essay so moving.

Sarika's profound reflection and her mature realization that artistic expression can take numerous forms are what make her essay so moving. ⁤⁤She conveys a strong message about accepting one's abilities and exploring many avenues for artistic expression. ⁤By the time the essay comes to an end, Sarika has come to terms with her destiny and even begun to like it. ⁤⁤She finds happiness in the rhythmic tapping of her keyboard late into the night, creating stories that have the grace and complexity of a dance that has been expertly choreographed.

Francisco's Essay

Are you aiming for the Ivy League or other top colleges? Let The Ivy Institute be your trusted guide through the complex process. Our team, composed of former Ivy League admissions officers and students, offers unparalleled guidance, maximizing your chances of acceptance to your top colleges. Renowned for innovative strategies, we’ve achieved the highest success rates year after year with our students achieving a success rate 10-12 times higher than the average—garnering features in over 500 global publications including Forbes, USA Today, and Newsmax. If you want the highest chance of acceptance, why settle for less? Choose The Ivy Institute! You may learn more and schedule a consultation at www.theivyinst.org .

Three days before I got on a plane to go across the country for six weeks I quit milk cold-turkey. I had gone to the chiropractor to get a general check up. I knew I had scoliosis and other problems; however, I learned that because of my excessive, to say the least, intake of milk my body had developed a hormone imbalance. I decided it would be best for my health to completely stop drinking milk and avoid dairy when possible. Little did I know, this was only the start of a summer of change; three days later I got on a plane to attend the Minority Introduction To Engineering and Science (MITES) program in Massachusetts.

I was afraid; afraid my support wouldn't be good enough, afraid to show that I cared, afraid they didn't care for me.

I assumed that most of the people were going to be unhealthily competitive because of my past experiences. I thought I would keep to myself, do my work, and come back no different. Living in a building with 80 people I’ve never met in a place I’ve never been while making a significant life style change was not easy. The first few days were not kind: I got mild stomach ulcers, it was awkward, and I felt out of place. That first Thursday night however, all of that started to change. On Thursday evenings we had “Family Meetings” and on this particular Thursday part of our Machine Learning class was working together when the time came to go to the dining hall for whatever this “Family Meeting” was. Honestly we dreaded it at first, “I have work to do” was the most common phrase. We learned that “Family Meeting” was a safe space for us to talk about anything and everything. Today’s theme was, “what’s something important about your identity that makes you unique?” but the conversation quickly evolved into so much more. People spoke about losing family members, being shunned at home, not feeling comfortable in their own skin, and more. So many people opened up about incredibly personal things, I felt honored to be given that trust. The room was somber and warm with empathy as the meeting concluded. Out of my peripheral vision I saw Izzy, one of my Machine Learning classmates, rushing back to the conference room. I realized something was not right. Instinctively, I followed her back to where we were working. Izzy sat down and immediately broke down, the rest of us filed in as she started to talk about what was wrong. It felt as though an ambulance was sitting on my chest, my breaths were short and stingy. I was afraid; afraid my support wouldn’t be good enough, afraid to show that I cared, afraid they didn’t care for me. In this one moment all my insecurities, some I didn’t even know I had, came to the surface. The heavy silence of hushed sobbing was broken by an outpouring of support and a hug. We all started sharing what we’re going through and even some of our past trauma. Slowly that weight is lifted off my chest. I feel comfortable, I feel wanted, I feel safe.

This is the first time I truly felt confident, empowered, and loved. I am surrounded by people smarter than me and I don’t feel any lesser because of it. I have become the true Francisco, or Cisco as they call me. I now, at all times, am unapologetically myself. The difference is night and day. As the program progressed I only felt more comfortable and safe, enough so to even go up and speak at a family meeting. These people, this family, treated me right. I gained priceless confidence, social skills, self-worth, empathetic ability, and mental fortitude to take with me and grow on for the rest of my life. Through all of this somehow cutting out the biggest part of my diet became the least impactful part of my summer.

Francisco's essay, "Three Days Before I Got on a Plane," describes his involvement in the Minority Introduction to Engineering and Science (MITES) program at M.I.T., which serves as the backdrop for his introspective voyage. The story starts with a seemingly minor decision—giving up milk for health reasons—but it soon turns into a metaphor for the life-changing events that transpire. The essay skillfully makes use of this internal transformation to set up a summer that would fundamentally alter Francisco's perception of himself and his interactions with others. He is first nervous about the MITES program because he anticipates a very competitive setting that would make him feel even more alone. The physical and psychological difficulties he encounters early in the program—such as minor stomach ulcers and a strong sense of alienation—reinforce this worry.

But at the program's weekly "Family Meetings," which are meant to encourage candid conversation and support among members, the story takes a dramatic turn. Here is when Francisco undergoes a significant transformation. One meeting's theme, "what's something important about your identity that makes you unique?" expands into increasingly detailed, intimate revelations, turning the gathering into an environment of empathy and vulnerability. Francisco is extremely touched by the candor with which his peers have shared their personal issues, and this prompts him to reconsider how he approaches the program and his peers in general.

⁤Francisco's essay does a fantastic job of illustrating how community and candid conversation can have a significant impact on personal development.

Francisco's essay does a fantastic job of illustrating how community and candid conversation can have a significant impact on personal development. His experience serves as a testament to both the value of safe spaces in learning environments and the transformational potential of empathy. By the time the essay comes to an end, Francisco has grown as a person and acknowledges that he is now "the true Francisco," or "Cisco" as his friends call him. He highlights how this experience has given him the confidence to be authentically himself and has given him priceless social skills, self-worth, and emotional fortitude that he will use throughout his life.

Although Francisco's essay effectively recounts a transformative summer experience, it could be enhanced by the inclusion of additional personal details and background information to provide a more comprehensive understanding of his life and experiences. Valuable context could be provided by including specifications about his initial interest in engineering and science or his prior experiences with competitiveness. Expanding on how the MITES program influenced his long-term goals would further enhance the essay. Additionally, elaborating on his relationships with peers both before and after the program would offer a clearer picture of his social growth. These additional details would create a more complete and compelling narrative—presenting Francisco as a multifaceted individual.

Billy's Essay

As an admission essay specialist , Dan Lichterman has been empowering students to find their voice since 2004. He helps students stand out on paper, eliminating the unnecessary so the necessary may speak. Drawing upon his storytelling background, Dan guides applicants to craft authentic essays that leap off the page. He is available for online writing support within the US and internationally. To learn more and schedule a brief complimentary consultation visit danlichterman.com.

Successful Harvard Essay:

As I rode up and down the gentle slopes of the Peabody skatepark, I watched my younger brother race down from the highest point on the halfpipe and fly past me at the speed of light. I wish I could do that, I thought, eyeing the enormous curve that towered over me. But I didn’t dare make my way up to the top. Instead, I stuck with the routine I was comfortable with, avoiding the steep inclines at all costs.

Each week during the summer before my fourth grade year, my brother and I would visit that same skatepark, and I would take my mini-BMX bike to the bottom of that monstrous ramp, ready to attack the giant. I started off low reaching only a quarter of the way up at first, too scared to go any higher. But each week, I gained more confidence and kept reaching greater heights. Halfway there, two-thirds, three quarters. Until finally, I mustered up enough courage to complete my final challenge.

With my brother’s shouts of joy ringing in my ears, it seemed as though the concrete mass was calling my name, drawing me closer and closer, until I couldn’t resist its pleading any further. I walked my bike up the stairs and approached the steep drop off. My hands started to sweat and my legs began to shake as I inched toward the edge, staring in the face of doom. Finally at the lip of the ramp, I paused briefly, took a deep breath, and moved forward just enough to send myself speeding downwards. I couldn’t contain my excitement as my, “Woooo!” echoed around the park. I had finally ridden down the tallest ramp!

Throughout my life I have enjoyed having a plan and being in control. When working in a group, I make sure that everyone knows exactly which aspect of the project they will complete. I organize all my homework in a planner so that I never miss a due date. Each night, I outline my schedule for the following day so that I know what meetings, sports events, and other activities I have to attend. When I visited New York City over the summer, I prepared a detailed itinerary to follow. Rarely is there a day when I don’t have a general idea of what I’m going to do, but sometimes my plan doesn’t correlate with how the day truly plays out.

Over the years, I have learned to adapt when situations take an unexpected turn, and, similar to that time at the skatepark, I have been able to step out of my comfort zone more often.

Over the years, I have learned to adapt when situations take an unexpected turn, and, similar to that time at the skatepark, I have been able to step out of my comfort zone more often. It isn’t the end of the world when things don’t go exactly as planned; often times, sudden changes and new experiences make for a more enjoyable and interesting time. As much as I enjoy a strict itinerary, some of my best nights have begun by hopping in the car with my friends, picking a direction, and going wherever the wind takes us. As hard as I try to plan out my day, an unforeseen event is almost inevitable. Although this can bring about some stress, scrambling around to figure things out is not only an essential skill, but can be a fun challenge, too.

I can’t imagine a completely organized life without a little uncertainty. Unexpected circumstances are bound to occur, and making the most of them is one of my favorite parts of life. Regardless of how much I love having a plan, my flexibility and willingness to step out of my comfort zone is something I have and will always take pride in.

Professional Review by Dan Lichterman

Billy's story of conquering Peabody skatepark's monstrous ramp is about more than simply broadening his comfort zone through incremental risk exposure.

Billy’s story of conquering Peabody skatepark’s monstrous ramp is about more than simply broadening his comfort zone through incremental risk exposure. To truly appreciate how this vignette enhances his candidacy, one must consider its larger context. Billy admits to being a hyper-organized itinerary maker who has always loved being in control. The image of a fourth grade Billy dropping in on his BMX bike is the exact opposite of the one portrayed by his extensive extracurricular leadership and ambitious environmental engineering aspirations. Without explicitly saying so, Billy’s essay shows us just how much his free-range childhood summer now diverges from his rigidly hyper-scheduled high school years. While it may feel like a lifetime ago, Billy hasn’t forgotten what it's like to inch towards the edge, stare into the face of doom, and willingly let go. In fact, the memory is just as vivid now, eight years later, whenever Billy presses the pause button on his goal-directed pursuits to take a beat, throw caution to the wind, and embark on an impromptu road-trip adventure with friends. Billy’s half-pipe story balances out a candidacy that could risk appearing guarded or inflexible in its absence, demonstrating self-awareness about the opportunity cost of becoming overly wedded to a game plan.

Lauren's Essay

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Lunch and recess were opportunities to ‘play’ Stephen Sondheim’s Sweeney Todd, so we murdered our friends. We’d bake the dead into meat pies and scream cacophonously, “WE ALL DESERVE TO DIE!” Nine-year-old me even teased my hair, donned my Mrs. Lovett costume for Halloween, and rambled on about Australian penal colonies and how dead fiddle players make for “stringy” meat. You cannot imagine my disappointment when everybody thought I was Frankenstein’s Bride.

Like Gypsy Rose Lee, my siblings and I spent our formative years at rehearsals and performances, where I was indoctrinated into the cult that worships Sondheim. In our household, Sondheimian theatre was a religion (I’m not sure how I feel about God, but I do believe in Sondheim.) My brother and I read Sondheim’s autobiography, Finishing the Hat, like the bible, reading the book cover to cover and returning to page one the moment we finished. At six, he introduced me to Sondheim’s West Side Story, which illustrates the harms of poverty and systematic racism. Initially, I only appreciated Jerome Robbins’ choreography (Sorry, Mr. Shakespeare). When I revisited the musical years later, I had a visceral reaction as I witnessed young adults engaging in deadly gang rivalries. Experiencing Tony’s gruesome death forced me, a middle-class suburbanite, to feel the devastating effects of inner-city violence, and my belief in the need for early intervention programs to prevent urban gun violence was born.

I began to discover political and historical undertones in all of Sondheim’s work. For example, Assassins whirlwinds from the Lincoln era up to Reagan’s Presidency. Originally, I simply thought it was hysterical to belt Lynette Fromme’s love ballad to Charles Manson. Later, I realized how much history I had unknowingly retained from this musical. The song “November 22, 1963” reflects on America’s most notorious assassination attempts, and alludes to each assassin being motivated by a desperate attempt to connect to a specific individual or culture to gain control over their life. Assassins awakened me to the flaws in some of our quintessential American ideals because the song “Everybody’s Got the Right” illustrates how the American individualism enshrined in our Constitution can be twisted to support hate, harm, and entitlement. I internalized Sondheim’s political commentary, and I see its relevance in America's most pressing issues. The misconstrued idea of limitless freedom can be detrimental to public health, worsening issues such as the climate crisis, gun violence, and the coronavirus pandemic. These existential threats largely stem from antiquated ideas that the rights of the few outweigh the rights of the majority. Ironically, a musical about individuals who tried to dismantle our American political system sparked my political interests, but this speaks to the power of Sondheim’s music and my ability to make connections and draw inspiration from unlikely sources.

I'm an aspiring political changemaker, and Sondheim's musicals influence my political opinions by enabling me to empathize with communities living drastically different lives from my own.

Absorbing historical and political commentary set to music allows my statistical and logical brain to better empathize with the characters, giving me a deeper understanding of the conflicts portrayed on stage, almost like reading a diary. Theatremakers are influenced by both history and their life experiences. I internalize their underlying themes and values, and my mindset shifts to reflect the art that I adore. I’m an aspiring political changemaker, and Sondheim’s musicals influence my political opinions by enabling me to empathize with communities living drastically different lives from my own.

I sang Sondheim melodies before I could talk. As I grew intellectually and emotionally, Sondheim’s musicals began to carry more weight. With each viewing, I retained new historical and political information. This ritual drives me to continue studying Sondheim and enables me to confidently walk my own path because Sondheim’s work passively strengthens my ethics as I continue to extrapolate relevant life lessons from his melodies. Sondheim’s stories, with their complex, morally ambiguous characters, have solidified my ironclad set of morals which, together with my love of history, have blossomed into a passion for human rights and politics.

Professional Review by Admission Science

Lauren's essay has punch. From the first line, where she's gleefully "murdering" friends in a Sweeney Todd-themed recess game, you're hooked. This isn't your average personal essay; it's a wild ride through a Sondheim-obsessed childhood. One where "theatre was a religion" and Finishing the Hat was the bible.

What makes this essay stand out is Lauren's unabashed passion. She doesn't just like musicals. West Side Story actually gave her visceral reactions that shaped her intellectual growth. Lauren describes how the political context of those musicals ignited her passion for social justice. She also reveals a mind that's both analytical and creative, connecting historical anthems to modern-day issues like gun violence and the pandemic.

Your college essay is the best place to let your authentic voice through. So be sure to pick a topic you're truly invested in.

This is something we always encourage students to do—let your passion shine. Your college essay is the best place to let your authentic voice through. So be sure to pick a topic you're truly invested in. That passion will be contagious, and it will leave a lasting impression on the reader.

Lauren also did an excellent job of maintaining a relatable and endearing tone ("I’m not sure how I feel about God, but I do believe in Sondheim"). She successfully tied her passion for Sondheim's work to her aspiration to become a political changemaker. This alignment of passion and purpose is compelling and is ultimately what makes her a strong candidate for Harvard.

Daniella's Essay

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Each time I bake cookies, they come out differently. Butter, sugar, eggs, flour — I measure with precision, stir with vigor, then set the oven to 375°F. The recipe is routine, yet hardly redundant.

After a blizzard left me stranded indoors with nothing but a whisk and a pantry full of the fundamentals, I made my first batch: a tray of piping hot chocolate chunkers whose melt-in-the-mouth morsels comforted my snowed-in soul. Such a flawless description, however, belies my messy process. In reality, my method was haphazard and carefree, the cookies a delicious fortuity that has since been impossible to replicate.

Each subsequent batch I make is a gamble. Will the cookies flatten and come out crispy? Stay bulbous and gooey? Am I a bad baker, or are they inherently capricious? Even with a recipe book full of suggestions, I can never place a finger on my mistake. The cookies are fickle and short-tempered. Baking them is like walking on eggshells — and I have an empty egg carton to prove it. Perhaps beginner’s luck had been the secret ingredient all along.

I became engrossed in perfecting the cookies not by the mechanical satisfaction of watching ingredients combine into batter, but by the chance to wonder at simplicity. The inconsistency is captivating.

Yet, curiosity keeps me flipping to the same page in my recipe book. I became engrossed in perfecting the cookies not by the mechanical satisfaction of watching ingredients combine into batter, but by the chance to wonder at simplicity. The inconsistency is captivating. It is, after all, a strict recipe, identical ingredients combined in the same permutation. How can such orthodox steps yield such radical, unpredictable results? Even with the most formulaic tasks, I am questioning the universe.

Chemistry explains some of the anomaly. For instance, just a half-pinch extra of baking soda can have astounding ramifications on how the dough bubbles. The kitchen became my laboratory: I diaried each trial like a scientist; I bought a scale for more accurate measurements; I borrowed “On Food and Cooking: the Science and Lore of the Kitchen” from the library. But all to no avail — the variables refused to come together in any sort of equilibrium.

I then approached the problem like a pianist, taking the advice my teacher wrote in the margins of my sheet music and pouring it into the mixing bowl. There are 88 pitches on a keyboard, and there are a dozen ingredients in the recipe. To create a rhapsodic dessert, I needed to understand all of the melodic and harmonic lines and how they complemented one another. I imagined the recipe in Italian script, the chocolate chips as quick staccatos suspended in a thick adagio medium. But my fingers always stumbled at the coda of each performance, the details of the cookies turning to a hodgepodge of sound.

I whisk, I sift, I stir, I pre-heat the oven again, but each batch has its flaws, either too sweet, burnt edges, grainy, or underdone. Though the cookies were born of boredom, their erratic nature continues to fascinate me. Each time my efforts yield an imperfect result, I develop resilience to return the following week with a fresh apron, ready to try again. I am mesmerized by the quirks of each trial. It isn’t enough to just mix and eat — I must understand.

My creative outlook has kept the task engaging. Despite the repetition in my process, I find new angles that liven the recipe. In college and beyond, there will be things like baking cookies, endeavors that seem so unvaried they risk spoiling themselves to a housewife’s drudgery. But from my time in the kitchen, I have learned how to probe deeper into the mechanics of my tasks, to bring music into monotony, and to turn work into play. However the cookie crumbles in my future, I will approach my work with curiosity, creativity, and earnestness.

Professional Review by EssayEdge

Daniella’s essay is lovely, fun and effective. It genuinely and naturally showcases different sides of her, how she approaches problems, what she values. The mundaneness of the topic fits her conclusion and insights beautifully. She employs humor, shows resilience, creativity, intellectual curiosity and an authentic propensity for philosophical thought. Her “voice” is confident, the word choice creative, and the vocabulary in each paragraph poignantly reflects different sides of her (the scientist “diared each trial”; the musician tries to create a “rhapsodic dessert”).

This structure is bold, and humble. It allows Daniella to show rather than tell the reader how she thinks, how she solves problems, how she perseveres.

The several paragraphs detailing Daniella’s cookie making process are also very strong. She lingers with sensual details that resonate (you can smell, taste and feel those chocolate chunkers) rather than overstuffing the essay with mentions of her various credentials or experiences. This structure is bold, and humble. It allows Daniella to show rather than tell the reader how she thinks, how she solves problems, how she perseveres. This is very powerful.

This essay measures 618 words (standard limit is 650). Daniella could have used the additional words to add to paragraph 3: when else did she experienced that similar processes lead to different results – perhaps in music performance? And/or in the next paragraph(s) she might have added a sentence to consider the potential impact of atmospheric conditions on baking, as well as more broadly/metaphorically.

Clara's Essay

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My nightstand is home to a small menagerie of critters, each glass-eyed specimen lovingly stuffed with cotton. Don’t get the wrong idea, now – I’m not a taxidermist or anything. I crochet.

Crochet is a family tradition. My grandmother used to wield her menacing steel hook like a mage’s staff and tout it as such: an instrument that bestowed patience, decorum, and poise on its owner. During her youth in Vietnam, she spent her evenings designing patterns for ornate doilies and handkerchiefs. Then the Vietnam War turned our family into refugees. The Viet Cong imprisoned my grandfather, a colonel in the South Vietnam Air Force, in a grueling labor camp for thirteen years. Many wives would have lost hope, but my grandmother was no average woman. A literature professor in a time when women’s access to education was limited, she assumed the role of matriarch with wisdom and confidence, providing financial and emotional security. As luxuries like yarn grew scarce, she conjured up all sorts of useful household items – durable pillowcases, blankets, and winter coats – and taught my mother to do the same. Because of these bitter wartime memories, she wanted my handiwork to be of a decidedly less practical bent; among the first objects she taught me to crochet were chrysanthemums and roses. However, making flowers bloom from yarn was no easy task.

Even with its soft plastic grip and friendly rounded edges, my first crochet hook had a mind of its own, like the enchanted broom in “The Sorcerer’s Apprentice.” It stubbornly disobeyed my orders as I impatiently wrenched it through the yarn. My grandmother’s stern appraisal of my efforts often interrupted this perpetual tug-of-war: My stitches were uneven. The edges curled inward. I would unravel my work and start anew.

I convinced myself that cobbling together a lopsided rectangle would be the pinnacle of my crochet prowess but refused to give up. Just as a diligent wizard casts more advanced spells over time, I learned to channel the magic of the crochet hook. The animal kingdom is my main source of inspiration; the diversity and vivid pigmentation of life on Earth lend themselves perfectly to the vibrant and versatile art of crochet. Many of the animals I make embark on migratory journeys, like their real-life counterparts. Take Agnes, for example, a cornflower-blue elephant named after mathematician Maria Gaetana Agnesi who lives in my calculus teacher’s classroom, happily grazing on old pencil shavings and worksheets. As I fasten off the final stitches on every creature, I hope to weave a little whimsy and color into someone’s life.

Each piece I finish reminds me of the network of stitches that connects mother and daughter, past and present, tradition and innovation.

Each piece I finish reminds me of the network of stitches that connects mother and daughter, past and present, tradition and innovation. In this vast cultural web, I am proud to be my family’s link between East and West. As I prepare for adulthood, I am eager to weave my own mark into the great patchwork quilt that is America.

Professional Review by PrepMaven

Clara’s essay seamlessly integrates her voice, family history, and current character into a moving and effective narrative. Here’s how:

She starts with a perfect opening. Through vivid, specific word choice (a nightstand of “glass-eyed specimens”), the essay showcases Clara’s voice and humor (“not a taxidermist”). At the same time, this essay quickly introduces the subject: crocheting.

The essay then “zooms out” to raise the stakes. Crocheting isn’t just a hobby: it’s a tradition that sustained Clara’s family through the Vietnam War. While Clara mentions the brutal reality of her family’s experiences, she quickly returns the focus to herself. It’s something many students forget: whatever your past struggles, your essay must be about you now.

Clara won't be deterred by failure, won't quit because something's tough.

The essay then gives us insight into her character. Clara won’t be deterred by failure, won’t quit because something’s tough. By focusing on her attempts to improve her crocheting skills, Clara displays the maturity, perseverance, and self-awareness often missing from application essays.

And Clara’s essay sticks the landing. We teach students to bridge past, present, and future in their essays. Clara does that: writing about crocheting allows Clara to end with a sophisticated discussion of how her family’s history informs not just her current life, but her future college goals.

Orlee's Essay

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I’m hiding behind the swing door of the dressing room when I text my mom just one word: “Traumatizing!” I’m on a bra-shopping expedition with my grandmother, and just in case it’s not abundantly clear, this trip was Not. My. Idea. Bra shopping has always been shrouded in mystery for me, and growing up in a household with two moms and two younger sisters hasn’t helped one bit: One of my moms doesn’t wear bras; the other proudly proclaims that her bras are older than me. A two-mom family without the faintest idea what a teenage girl needs—par for the course around here.

So when my 78-year-old grandmother volunteered to take me bra shopping, my moms jumped at the chance. Here I was with my frugal grandmother, outlet-shopping among the racks of intimates that aren’t sized quite right, that have too much padding or too little…You can see my predicament, and it’s no surprise that my younger self was confused by the words “wire-free,” “concealing petals,” “balconette.”

The saleswoman called to my grandmother from across the store, “What cup size is she?”

“I don’t know,” my grandmother screamed back. “Can you measure her?”

Measure me? They have got to be kidding.

“I just don’t want her to feel different,” I heard my grandmother say later that day. “Kids this age can be so mean.”

I love my grandmother, but she believes the world is harsh and unforgiving, and she thinks that the only path to happiness is fitting in. My grandmother had taken me bra shopping in a last-ditch attempt to make me “normal” because I was entering 9th grade at Deerfield in a few weeks, and she worried that I would stick out worse than the underwire of a bargain basement bra.

I'm a day student with lesbian moms who have several fewer zeros on their bank account balance than typical Deerfield parents.

It’s true—I’m not your typical Deerfield student. I’m a day student with lesbian moms who have several fewer zeros on their bank account balance than typical Deerfield parents. I’m the kid with a congenital foot deformity, which means I literally can’t run, who will never be able to sprint across campus from classroom to classroom. I’m the kid with life-threatening food allergies to milk and tree nuts who can’t indulge in the pizza at swim team celebrations or the festive cake and ice cream during advisory meetings.

But fitting in was my grandmother’s worry, not mine. What my grandmother didn’t consider is that there’s no single way to fit in. I might be two minutes later to class than the sprinters, but I always arrive. I might have to explain to my friends what “having two moms” means, but I’ll never stop being thankful that Deerfield students are eager to lean in and understand. I may not be able to eat the food, but you can count on me to show up and celebrate.

While I can’t run, I can swim and play water polo, and I can walk the campus giving Admissions tours. My family might not look like everyone else’s, but I can embrace those differences and write articles for the school newspaper or give a talk at “School Meeting,” sharing my family and my journey. Some of my closest friendships at Deerfield have grown from a willingness on both sides to embrace difference.

On one of the first days of 9th grade, I sat down to write a “Deerfield Bucket List”—a list of experiences that I wanted to have during my four years in high school, including taking a Deerfield international trip and making the Varsity swim team. That list included thirteen items, and I’m eleven-thirteenths of the way there, not because I have the right bra, but because I’ve embraced the very thing that my grandmother was afraid of. Bra shopping is still shrouded in mystery for me, but I know that I am where I should be, I’m doing work that matters to me, and fitting in rarely crosses my mind.

Professional Review by The College Guru

The Common App essay allows you to speak directly to Admissions, in your own voice, sharing important personal attributes and insights into who you are at your core, and demonstrating how you will enrich the college’s community. In choosing your topic, it is vitally important to remember that up until now, Admissions will have heard about you from everyone except you. Now, it’s your opportunity to shine, bringing your true personality to the forefront and showing how well you will fit in with the incoming class they are building.

Here, we meet Orlee as she is shopping for a bra, accompanied by her doting grandmother. Orlee dives right in, unexpectedly dropping us into an embarrassing, “traumatizing” moment she bravely chose to share. Within a few seconds, we are also introduced to her two self-described fashion-agnostic moms. This is just the first paragraph and I like her already. With an average of only a few minutes to read each essay, Admissions readers will want to find out where this is headed.

Early on, we learn that Orlee’s grandmother’s view of the world—“harsh and unforgiving”—makes her protective of Orlee and that her proposed solution is to help Orlee fit in so she will be perceived as “normal.” Initially, we think this essay is about teen angst, but in a surprise twist, Orlee quickly lets us know her grandmother’s fears about her fitting in are neither unreasonable nor unfounded.

Orlee reveals she has a congenital foot deformity limiting her ability to run and a severe, life-threatening food allergy. Now that she has our attention, she masterfully weaves in additional snapshots of her daily life, demonstrating how she bravely chooses to show up in difficult moments. Her straightforward descriptions are not manipulative, but instead, her outlook is upbeat. We learn about her perseverance and that she is always up for a challenge. She demonstrates how she finds ways to create space for herself so she will be included, and she rightfully doesn’t ask for permission or apologize for her physical challenges.

Mindful that others may be quick to put her in a box because of her apparent physical challenges, Orlee immediately focuses us on the many strengths she can contribute on campus, providing several clear illustrations of how she dives right in and overcomes others’ negative perceptions. She regales us with the countless ways she has found to enrich her school as a team player, lest we are tempted to fall into the unfortunate trap of underestimating her abilities.

⁤Orlee has set inspiring life goals, and her endearing high school bucket list is nearly complete. This student isn't afraid to go for it and get it.

Orlee has set inspiring life goals, and her endearing high school bucket list is nearly complete. This student isn’t afraid to go for it and get it. She is simply living her best life, and I find myself cheering for her!

This essay succeeds because it tells us who Orlee is and how she thrives, that she values friends and teammates, and will bring that same energy to her college community. She is intelligent, curious, confident, and kind. She sets her goals and charts her vision to support her worldview. “Fitting in rarely crosses [her] mind.” This is her Brand Story and I am here for it!

Marcus' Essay

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Successful Harvard Essay: ‘Identity’ & ‘Overcoming An Obstacle'

As late afternoon sunlight danced on my shoulders, I squished my eight-year-old face against the glass of the outdoor tank, eyes wide and searching for any signs of life. There! I scrambled from where I was seated, chasing the flickering sight of my prize. The otter darted away from me, his lithe body disappearing into a crack in the stones. I slumped against the wall, disappointed. Ever the HR representative, my mother saw my face and asked me what was wrong. I explained my frustration with the otters -- they’re so fun to watch, but they refuse to be seen. My mother leaned down, brushing a long lock of hair out of my face, and told me, “Sometimes, the animals get tired of being watched. They just want to be left alone.”

I didn’t think much of the otters after that. Until I became one.

In October of my sophomore year, I was four months into my transition from female to male. I wasn’t out to my extended family, my wardrobe was a haphazard mess of cargo shorts and skirts, and my voice was still, to my distress, annoyingly high. Being transgender at Middleton High School was no small feat -- I stuck out in a sea of over 2,000 cisgender peers, and most of my teachers did not know how to deal with people “in my situation,” as one put it.

One day, as I walked to my bus after school, I heard snickers from behind me. I turned around and saw a rowdy group of boys. One had his phone up, recording me. Everyone was laughing, and in an instant I knew they were laughing at me. I turned and walked away, doing my best to conceal myself from their view. The laughter continued.

I was the star of a humiliating show that I never asked to be a part of. I had become the otter. Their laughs kept ringing in my ears as I sat alone on the bus. I wanted to crawl inside myself and implode rather than think about going back to face them again the next day. My phone kept buzzing, but I refused to check it. It was only when I arrived home and checked those messages that I found that the video had been posted across social media for hundreds of my peers to see. It seemed like nothing, just a video of me walking, turning, and looking away. But their laughs were clear in the background, and I still understood the point of the video -- look at the freak. Look at the new zoo exhibit.

Seeing that video, I realized that I couldn’t allow myself to turn into what they saw me as. They wanted an otter, a punching bag that wouldn’t fight back. I was not going to be their otter. The next day, I went to my first Sexuality and Gender Equality club meeting. I spoke to the administration about what had happened. I saved the video and showed people. I took control.

Maybe they'll never see me as an equal, but that is their blindness, not mine.

Those boys wanted me to believe that I was merely an exhibit to be laughed at, but now I know I live for greater things. I live for lattes, for courtroom closing arguments, for the pesto I make at work. I live for Black Lives Matter and #enough and Pride. I live for kayaking and summer camp, for the kids in SAGE and my younger sister. My classmates tried to dehumanize me, trample me, and mold me into their image of transgender people. Maybe they’ll never see me as an equal, but that is their blindness, not mine. I do not live on display. I do not live in a zoo.

Professional Review by MR. MBA®, Val Misra

Marcus does an excellent job of creating a deeply heartfelt, introspective, and triumphant personal development story in this thought-provoking essay focusing on ‘identity’ and ‘overcoming an obstacle’. It can be risky to discuss two major themes, but he interweaves them flawlessly. Each paragraph stands alone as wonderful insight, written in beautiful creative prose, into Marcus’ journey- from childhood confusion (encounter with the otter) to future self-discovery and isolation (he becomes the otter), to self-acceptance and determination (he will not be bullied), and ultimately to victory (his passion and love for his life).

In Paragraphs 1-2, Marcus' individual anecdote on the zoo otter is highly effective to frame the larger discussion of his challenging transition from cisgender to transgender.

In Paragraphs 1-2, Marcus’ individual anecdote on the zoo otter is highly effective to frame the larger discussion of his challenging transition from cisgender to transgender. His mother’s wisdom about an otter’s reasoning for self-isolation shines brightly, setting the foundation for what is to come. Marcus’ self-comparison to the otter he once saw in the zoo intrigues me to read on.

Para 3 effectively highlights the difficulties he endured during his transition in high school- his coming out, his clothing, his high-pitched voice, and academic faculty challenges. These examples help the reader understand his plight.

Para 4-5 depict Marcus’ self-realization that he has now become the zoo otter- a show piece, a “freak”, something he never asked to be. He weaves a sad, rather troubling encounter in high school of bullying and public humiliation that causes him sorrow, isolation and questioning his self-worth. Marcus’ honesty invokes true emotions and I really feel for him.

The ‘A-ha’ moment arrives in Para 6, where Marcus crafts delightful, deep introspection and realization that he will not be the butt of jokes but an agent of change. He takes “control” by attending club meetings and speaking with school faculty.

Para 7 embodies the victory lap, as Marcus details his joys, self-acceptance and who he is now. He loves coffee, the law, his work, kayaking, his sister, Black Lives Matter and sex-gender associations. Wisdom is shared through his understanding that he cannot change the ignorance of others but live a purposeful, passion-filled life as his new self- a sincere message to the reader and, likely, others like him.

Overall, this winning essay takes the reader on a vivid, emotional and well-structured journey, sharing the author’s unique experiences and why these experiences are significant for his growth and maturity.

Michelle's Essay

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Fish Out of Water: idiom. a person who is in an unnatural environment; completely out of place.

When I was ten, my dad told me we were moving to somewhere called "Eely-noise." The screen flashed blue as he scrolled through 6000 miles of water on Google Earth to find our new home. Swipe, swipe, swipe, and there it was: Illinois, as I later learned.

Moving to America was like going from freshwater into saltwater.

Moving to America was like going from freshwater into saltwater. Not only did my mom complain that American food was too salty, but I was helplessly caught in an estuary of languages, swept by daunting tides of tenses, articles, and homonyms. It’s not a surprise that I developed an intense, breathless kind of thirst for what I now realize is my voice and self-expression.

This made sense because the only background I had in English was “Konglish”--an unhealthy hybrid of Korean and English--and broken phrases I picked up from SpongeBob. As soon as I stepped into my first class in America, I realized the gravity of the situation: I had to resort to clumsy pantomimes, or what I euphemistically called body language, to convey the simplest messages. School became an unending game of pictionary.

Amid the dizzying pool of vowels and phonemes and idioms (why does spilling beans end friendships?), the only thing that made sense was pictures and diagrams. Necessarily, I soon became interested in biology as its textbook had the highest picture-to-text ratio. Although I didn’t understand all the ant-like captions, the colorful diagrams were enough to catch my illiterate attention: a green ball of chyme rolling down the digestive tract, the rotor of the ATP synthase spinning like a waterwheel. Biology drew me with its ELL-friendliness and never let go.

I later learned in biology that when a freshwater fish goes in saltwater, it osmoregulates--it drinks a lot of water and urinates less. This used to hold true for my school day, when I constantly chugged water to fill awkward silences and lubricate my tongue to form better vowels. This habit in turn became a test of English-speaking and bladder control: I constantly missed the timing to go to the bathroom by worrying about how to ask. The only times I could express myself were through my fingers, between the pages of Debussy and under my pencil tip. To fulfill my need for self-expression and communication, I took up classical music, visual art, and later, creative writing. To this day, I will never forget the ineffable excitement when I delivered a concerto, finished a sculpture, and found beautiful words that I could not pronounce. If biology helped me understand, art helped me be understood.

There’s something human, empathetic, even redemptive about both art and biology. While they helped me reconcile with English and my new home, their power to connect and heal people is much bigger than my example alone. In college and beyond, I want to pay them forward, whether by dedicating myself to scientific research, performing in benefit concerts, or simply sharing the beauty of the arts. Sometimes, language feels slippery like fish on my tongue. But knowing that there are things that transcend language grounds and inspires me. English seeped into my tongue eventually, but I still pursue biology and arts with the same, perhaps universal, exigency and sincerity: to understand and to be understood.

Over the years, I have come to acknowledge and adore my inner fish, that confused, tongue-twisted and home-sick ELL kid from the other side of the world, which will forever coexist within me. And I’ve forgiven English, although I still can’t pronounce words like “rural,” because it gifted me with new passions to look forward to every day. Now, when I see kids with the same breathless look that I used to have gasping for home water, Don’t worry, I want to tell them.

You’ll find your water.

Professional Review by HS2 Academy

Michelle’s essay offers the reader a picturesque and witty journey through their immigrant experience of adapting to their new life in Illinois (Eely-noise!). While some immigrant experience essays can come across as predictable, Michelle deftly crafts an extended metaphor using the idiom of a “fish out of water” to connect their passions for both biology and art with their evolving struggle to master English. The uniqueness comes in the candid and often humorous depictions of Michelle’s everyday struggles with language, from initially resorting to “clumsy pantomimes” to signal an intent to go to the bathroom to their “ineffable excitement” at finding beautiful new words to express themselves, showcasing Michelle’s eventual growth into an articulate writer in full command of the English language.

It's evident that Michelle genuinely loves writing and relishes finding the right words to convey their thoughts, showcasing their tenacity and love of learning.

Michelle’s diverse passions, ranging from music, to art, to biology, are on full display in this essay, but what’s most impressive is Michelle’s nuanced and introspective journaling of adapting to American life and culture. It’s evident that Michelle genuinely loves writing and relishes finding the right words to convey their thoughts, showcasing their tenacity and love of learning. Michelle’s sincere exuberance for growing as a writer and artist shines throughout this essay, with a warmth and humor that’s infectious.

Michael's Essay

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I’ve been alone for three years now.

My freshman year, my mother had to take a job as a live-in caregiver to make enough money to pay rent and other bills after my uncle got married and moved out. I was ecstatic. I could finally have the entire house to myself. I had imagined the countless hours on the PS4, nobody telling me to go to sleep or to go do my homework. I felt free. Unexpectedly, though, this freedom came at the expense of my childhood.

To compensate for never being home, my mother called me three times a day. The first call would always be at 6:00 a.m, like clockwork. That was the call to wake me up so that I wouldn’t miss the bus and be late for school. Then there was the 4:00 p.m call where we went over anything and everything that happened in school that day. Lastly, there was the 7:00 p.m call which always seemed to last over an hour. This was the call that made me miss my mother the most. We labeled this call the “multi-purpose” call. Sometimes we would just talk about how we were both doing. Other times she would teach me things I needed to know, like how to do laundry, how to go grocery shopping, or how to cook. But one thing that she always seemed to bring up was how she wished things were different and how much she ached with the desire to be home with her son.

She would always say how I was her pride and joy, but I've always thought of myself to be her hope, her hope for a better life.

That last call always weighed heavily on my heart. When around friends and their families, I would often put my head down and smile because their interactions would remind me so much of when my mother was with me every day. It made me miss her insurmountably, to the point where I began to despise every aspect of this “independence.” To me, it was loneliness, isolation, and nights laying in bed wishing I had a loved one in the house that I could talk to or hug. I was forced to become a man instead of living out my days as a kid. What hurt me the most, though, was knowing that my mother hated our situation even more than I did. She hated knowing her only child was growing up without her and it hurt her more than words could explain. She would always say how I was her pride and joy, but I’ve always thought of myself to be her hope, her hope for a better life.

That is why I have worked so hard in school. My mother has dedicated and sacrificed years of her life to make sure that her son could live a great one, and all she has ever asked from me in return was to do well in school. There were numerous times when I felt discouraged and unmotivated, but the thought of letting down the woman that has broken her back for me was far stronger than any fatigue I may have felt.

For three long years now, I have entered my house after school expecting nothing but silence and darkness. I lay in bed at night yearning to hear any sound at all that would signal that there was life in the house beside me. Then I wake up the next morning, get ready for school, and start the cycle all over again. I have almost gotten used to being alone. But I won’t let my story end here. The reason why I have worked myself so hard is so that things can be different for me and my mother. She always says that everything she’s doing now is for me and that when she gets old it’ll be my turn. Except when my turn comes, she will never have to be alone.

Professional Review by Quad Education

Michael’s essay begins with a gripping hook, leaving the reader wondering why he is alone. He reveals his mother's sacrifices and his initial excitement at newfound freedom, which quickly turns into the burden of a lost childhood. The essay effectively uses the routine of their daily phone calls to highlight his deep connection with his mother and the pain of their separation.

Michael's forced independence, unlike the typical chosen independence of college freshmen, emphasizes his resilience and maturity.

Michael’s forced independence, unlike the typical chosen independence of college freshmen, emphasizes his resilience and maturity. Despite the emotional toll, he channels his determination into academic excellence, driven by his mother’s sacrifices and his desire to ensure a better future for both of them.

This essay excels in presenting a clear and compelling narrative of personal growth under challenging circumstances beyond one’s control. Michael’s story demonstrates his maturity, resilience, and commitment, qualities that suggest he would thrive in a rigorous academic environment. His motivation and determination show he is not only ready for college but also has the potential to effect positive change in society. These are hallmarks of what Harvard seeks in potential students.

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Tuck’s 2024-2025 Essay Questions

By patricia harrison director of admissions, evaluation and yield.

We are excited to share an advance look at the Tuck application essays! The application for the 2024–2025 season will open soon, but we wanted to share the updated essay questions and Important Dates for the Class of 2027 with you now. Be sure to look for our upcoming Admissions Insights blog on the essays for advice and guidance on what we are looking for in each of our essay prompts.

All applicants must respond to the following essay prompts:

• Why are you pursuing an MBA and why now? How will the distinct Tuck MBA contribute to achieving your goals and aspirations? (300 words)
• Tell us who you are. How have your values and experiences shaped your identity and character? How will your background contribute to the diverse Tuck culture and community? (300 words)
• Describe a time you meaningfully contributed to someone else’s sense of inclusion in your professional or personal community. (300 words)

All reapplicants must respond to an additional essay prompt:

How have you strengthened your candidacy since you last applied? Please reflect on how you have grown personally and professionally. (300 words)

The following essay prompt is optional:

Please provide any additional insight or information that you have not addressed elsewhere (e.g., atypical choice of references, factors affecting academic performance, unexplained job gaps or changes). Complete this question only if you feel your candidacy is not fully represented by this application. (300 words)

The MBA application process is an opportunity to reflect on your experiences, your future plans, and your motivations. Just as you learn about us in the coming months, we can't wait to learn about you!

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The acceptance rate on a school’s website is not your chance of getting in

Schools calculate acceptance rates by dividing the number of accepted students by the total number that applied. Among all the students who apply, some have a 99% chance of acceptance, while others have less than a 1% chance.

There are factors outside your control that have an impact on your chances

Colleges and universities build each freshman class to include a diverse array of students, and that means selecting for diverse racial, economic, and personal backgrounds.

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Grades matter, but so does the difficulty of the classes you took. Extracurricular activities count, both in terms of what positions you have held and how you have improved your community.

We take all factors into account, just like admissions officers do

Most websites only consider GPA and test scores when determining what sort of applicant you are. We consider your coursework, GPA, extracurriculars, demographics, intended major, class rank, and test scores (if you have them).

We predict your admissions chances based on real data

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What the Pool of College Applicants Looked Like After Affirmative Action Ban

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The Common Application, a not-for-profit member organization that colleges and universities use to receive applications, didn’t see immediate major shifts in student-application behaviors following the June 2023 U.S. Supreme Court decision striking down affirmative action.

New data analysis of 6 million U.S.-based college applicants over five years to more than 800 institutions found that overall, when it came to the 2023-24 application season ending on April 30, how applicants chose to self-identify racially/ethnically, how diverse applicant pools were, and how often students chose to apply to selective institutions remained largely on trend with past years.

“I remember being heartened that it did not seem to be that there were changes in application patterns, that underrepresented students weren’t being dissuaded from applying,” said Jenny Rickard, the CEO of Common Application.

Researchers did note some exceptions, including upward spikes in the 2020-21 season from first-generation applicants at the height of the COVID-19 pandemic and at a time when institutions switched to test-optional policies for admission. More highly-achieving underrepresented minority applicants (Black or African American, Latinx, American Indian or Alaska Native, or Native Hawaiian or Other Pacific Islander) discussed their racial/ethnic identities in essays than nonunderrepresented minority applicants in the 2023-24 season.

Common Application researchers also acknowledged the need for future research on admission patterns following the Supreme Court’s decision on the role of race in admissions, the impact of schools’ use and disbanding of test-optional policies, and the effects of the tumultuous new FAFSA rollout .

Early findings prompt questions for down the road

Key questions researchers at the Common Application sought to study in their data analysis were:

• Are any changes observed in how students self-report their race/ethnicity on the platform?
• To what extent did the application behaviors of underrepresented racial/ethnic minority students and students who are not underrepresented change in this admissions season versus prior seasons?
• To what extent did the average diversity of member-institution applicant pools change in this season versus last season?
• And because there was a specific call out in the Supreme Court decision related to students being able to identify themselves and their experiences with respect to their racial/ethnic identity, is there a difference in how students discussed their racial/ethnic identity in their open-response essays this season versus last season?

The analysis includes application trends for selective institutions, meaning colleges and universities with admission rates below 25 percent as of 2021, students with high SAT or ACT scores and high GPAs, students with various underrepresented racial/ethnic identities, and first-generation students, according to Brian Kim, a senior data scientist for Common Application.

For the question on self-identification in personal essays, researchers analyzed student-essay data by checking to see whether students used any word or phrase out of a list that closely related to the discussion of their racial/ethnic identity, Kim said. Overall, there were more highly-achieving underrepresented minority students using such phrases than students who are not underrepresented in the latest application season.

To get a better sense of whether this difference was due to the high court’s decision, students themselves need to be interviewed, Kim said.

There was also some evidence to suggest most selective institutions on the Common Application platform may have received a slightly lower proportion of Asian students in their high-achiever pool, Kim said, but added that the change was slight. “That’s kind of up to interpretation, it depends on how you think about trend and expectation.”

For policymakers and those advising college hopefuls, Nat Smitobol, an admissions counselor with IvyWise, a for-profit college-admissions consulting firm, said that a longitudinal look at admissions data would be helpful moving forward to determine the impact of the Supreme Court’s decision.

Smitobol also calls for more research on how test-optional policies played out, including longitudinal studies on graduation rates of students admitted without college-admissions tests since those tests are often used as measures of how well students will succeed in a given institution.

Research on the troubled FAFSA rollout and how some students didn’t get need-based financial aid in time to help them make a decision will be necessary, too, he added.

As for future Common Application research, Kim said: “Not wanting to commit ourselves to anything in particular yet, but I would be surprised if we didn’t continue to look at this exact report one year from now to look at, do we see something two years on, especially knowing that a lot of these statistics are running throughout the season.”

For now, Smitobol advises all those working with high school students seeking to apply to college to note that highly selective and prestigious institutions—which were targeted in the Supreme Court decision—are not the only path toward higher education.

“There’s places all across the country that have really amazing outcomes, they’re very student-centric, and they’re not playing the admissions game the same way that prestigious colleges are,” Smitobol said.

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How Much Time Should You Spend on Each Component of Your College Application?

Whats Inside?

What is the importance of balanced time management, what components are involved in the college application timeline.

Applying to college can be difficult because there are so many considerations. Standardized test scores, personal essays, and other parts of your application demand careful attention and significant time. Effective time management is compulsory for submitting a strong application. Sufficient time for each component is vital to improving your academic and personal achievements. 

You can ensure a polished and competitive application by devoting the right amount of time to each aspect. A well-planned approach helps you highlight your strengths and demonstrate your passions and potential. By prioritizing your time wisely, you can confidently present your best self to potential colleges and universities, increasing your chances of acceptance.

The college application process is varied, with each component playing an important role in representing a well-rounded and capable candidate. Effective time management is essential to ensure no part of your application is neglected. According to a 2023 survey by the National Association for College Admission Counseling (NACAC), 78% of college admissions officers consider time management skills an important quality in applicants.

Understanding how much time to allocate to each component allows you to maximize efficiency and present a strong application. This balanced approach allows you to show your academic achievements, personal growth, and extracurricular activities, ultimately increasing your chances of standing out in a competitive applicant pool.

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By understanding each component's specific requirements and deadlines, students can create a personalized timeline to stay organized and on track. The college application timeline typically includes various components that require careful planning and time management to ensure a successful application submission. 

Standardized Test Preparation

Standardized tests, such as the SAT or ACT, often hold significant weight in college admissions. While the exact time commitment can vary based on individual needs and goals, it's generally recommended to begin preparing well in advance. SAT Tutoring can help you improve your scores efficiently through test preparation, making it an essential aspect of the college application. 

Many students benefit from enrolling in SAT Tutoring programs several months to a year before their desired test date. Consistent practice and familiarity with the test format are key to achieving optimal scores. Additionally, if necessary, students should factor in time for retakes, as many colleges consider the highest score obtained.

Preparing Your Essay

The personal essay demonstrates your personality, experiences, and aspirations to the admissions committee. Allocate 1-2 weeks for brainstorming topics, 3-4 weeks for drafting, and 2-3 weeks for revisions. Seek teacher, mentor, or editor feedback to ensure a clear, compelling, and error-free essay highlighting your strengths.

Gathering Letters of Recommendation

Letters of recommendation provide valuable insight into your academic abilities and character. Request them from teachers and mentors 2-3 months in advance. Spend 1-2 weeks identifying and approaching recommenders, then allocate 1-2 weeks for follow-up and timely submission. Effective communication and much time are essential for securing strong letters.

Completing the Application Form

The application form requires attention to detail and accuracy. Spend 1-2 weeks filling out basic information and compiling a list of activities and achievements. Then, review and edit for accuracy and completeness, ensuring all sections are filled out correctly and reflect your accomplishments.

Preparing for Interviews

Preparation is key to making a positive impression in interviews. Spend 2-3 weeks researching common questions and practicing responses. Then, allot time for fake interviews with teachers, mentors, or friends to build confidence and improve presentation skills . This preparation will help you stand out and leave a lasting impression.

Final Review and Submission

Before submitting your application, conduct a thorough final review to prevent mistakes and ensure a polished application. Allocate 1-2 weeks to proofread every component, use a checklist to ensure completeness, and submit the application a few days before the deadline to avoid last-minute technical issues.

How far in advance should I start my college application process?

It's advisable to start the college application process at least six months to a year before the application deadlines. This timeline allows ample time for test preparation, writing essays, gathering recommendations, and completing all necessary forms.

Can SAT tutoring significantly improve my test scores?

Yes, SAT Tutoring can provide personalized guidance, strategies, and practice to help improve your test scores. Tutors can identify your weaknesses and tailor their teaching methods to address your specific needs, leading to better performance on test day.

What should I do if I don’t have enough time for all the application components?

If you’re short on time, prioritize the components that carry the most weight in the admissions process, such as standardized test scores, personal essays, and letters of recommendation. Desire help from teachers, mentors, or professional services to manage your workload effectively.

Guiding the college application process requires careful planning and time management. By understanding how much time to devote to each component, you can ensure that every aspect of your application is given the attention it deserves. From standardized test preparation and personal essays to letters of recommendation and interviews, each part plays a vital role in your overall application.

Start early, stay organized, and desire help when needed to present a compelling and well-rounded application. Remember, the effort you invest in each component can significantly impact your chances of admission to your dream college.

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